PT re-evaluation today!

Hi friends, I have my re-evaluation for PT this morning at 9:30. I am really nervous about this. I want so much to do good. It is really stressing  me out! I want my numbers to be "right". I feel pressured. I am only putting the pressure on myself. And I know this. I am really trying hard to just relax and to push all this anxiety aside. This is an important evaluation for me. I have my doctors appt on Friday. And I want to discuss going back  to work. I am still in pretty high pain levels. The tens unit helps me when it is on. I asked yesterday at PT if I would be able to wear it today, and ofcourse the answer was no. She said they are re-evaluating me and how I am doing. I'll walk for 6 minutes timed and the distance measured. Then I'll see where I am with the back strength and mobility. That will be done on a machine. And I think that will be all. Mornings are not good times for me. I tend to hurt more in the mornings! And today is no exception. I will take my percocet and flexiril before I go. I sure hope that helps. I sound like a kid. I lost my tennis shoes. I can't find them anywhere. I will have to wear my flip flops. And those aren't the best shoes for this!!! I hoped to wake up early enough to run in a store and buy a new pair before the appt, that didn't happen. I overslept. And I am mad at myself for that!!! Anyway, I know this post is wierd and I am sounding all stressed. I don't mean to sound this way. I just can't help it. I will calm myself down on the drive there. I'll be okay. I am making more, way more of this than I need to. I just need to take a deep breath and relax. I am going to do the best that I can do. If the numbers show a big enough improvement and the doctor agreees, I may be released to go back to work. I'll post when I get home and let all of you know how it went. Thanks for letting me vent. Sorry to sound all messed  up in the head. I haven't had my coffee yet!!! Everything will work out  in whatever way it is suposed to. I can only do my best. But in the meantime, please keep your fingers crossed!!!!!!

Thank you WhiteBeard, I went back and reread my post. And I admit it made me laugh a little,too. I was way too stressed this morning!! Anyway, I wanted to post and just to touch base with someone out there to let you all know all the craziness and thoughts I was having at the moment. I did feel better afterwards. I drank my coffee on the way. By the time I got there I had calmed myself down somewhat.

The therapist talked to me at length today. I appreciated it. We discussed the tens unit. I was told by the therapist who gave it to me to turn it up to where I felt it but that it didn't hurt. And that is what I have been doing. I had it on to 4.5 and 5.0. Today my therapist said to turn it up high enough until it does hurt and then to bump it down a little. He said that the muscles would contract and that I would get numbness. He said it has to be used at high enough levels to reach the point of feeling the pain. He explained it in terms that it can be used like opioids, that I could get the same type of feeling in pain control... I haven't had it explained that way. And it contradicted what the therapist that gave it to me said. But I have it on now and at an 8.5 and a 9.0. It hurts, but I am sure it isn't high enough to get the numbness. I will turn it up higher a little later. I am having a hard time getting used to the increase in the numbers. He said this will go up to 60! I think I would pass out at that level!!!!! Anyway, I will increase the numbers in a few minutes and see what happens.

Okay, for the numbers. On the walking today I was at 60!!! On June 23rd I was at 45%. So this is better. I am still taking small steps but I am going faster. He did comment on my gait. He said I walk like a duck/penguin!!!!!! I know this and I can't help it. I can't take "normal" steps yet. My steps are small. He said we need to work on this to get me walking better. I want that in a bad way. I am embarrassed at how I walk. But I can't help it. I am doing the best that I can. On the strength (measured by equipment) part I was at a 40% today. On June 23rd I was at a 33%. And that is better too. He said that he wants me to join the health and fitness center. Since I am employed by the hosp. system,(even though I work in a office) I can join at a lower price. He said that I can go to the pool, whirlpool,sauna and work on the equipment there everyday if I want to. It is cheaper than the $20 copay that I have to pay for every PT session. He said it will have to be cleared by my doctor first.

I have a doctors' appt. on Friday morning. The therapist will send him the results and I have them written down too. I do plan to talk about returning to work. I have shown improvement with the PT. Although, I don't really feel better myself the numbers are showing an improvement.And that is what matters the most I guess. I guess I will feel better when the numbers are better than what they are now. I really am trying to get better. I have learned to be patient. It has been a long and hard lesson for me, but I guess I have gotten there. I have been hardheaded in that aspect. I just wanted to be better "now". I realize that it takes time. And no matter how much and what I want, it won't hurry things along to my satisfaction. I do want to go back to work. Maybe not next week, but I will ask if I can return the following week or atleast the first of the month. I miss my job bad. And I do think it will help me, atleast feel better emotionally. But I won't do an AmA(against medical advice), and I have to have the doctors okay before I can return anyway, regardless of what I want. I have been off for 11 weeks now. It will be 12 on Wednesday. I have rambled on long enough. I just wanted to give an update to where things stand with me regarding my re-evaluation from PT. Thanks for reading this. And I could use some input on the tens unit, if you don't mind. I know everyone is different but I could use some pointers. Do you actually get numb when the numbers are high. Having this at the 9.0 and the 8.5 hurt, but I don't think it is high enough to cause the numbness, he was talking about. How do you know when it is high enough? Any suggestions would be nice. I do need some input here. And I will keep in mind that you may be different than I am. I will take that into consideration,promise.
Anice

Hi Anice, it sounds so wonderful that you are finally improving even in small increments!!! But I agree with PAlady, you really need to relax, stress always raises pain levels! Good luck with your specialist appointment, thinking of you, golitho