I am so sorry to hear about 'when it rains it pours' issues with your health right now. I can totally commiserate!!
I have an amazing Pastoral Counselor that I see whenever I need to for that extra help in dealing with all my chronic pain and life issues. I do not have any insurance and they work on a sliding scale so I am not charged anything right now.
I'm sure it is so difficult to not be able to provide for your family the way that you are used to...that alone can take some time to mentally adjust a new way of seeing yourself. You are an amazing man and person just who you are. Even if you don't have two nickels to rub together...money does NOT make a man...
It's your character, your love for your family and your friends..that is what people respect and care about you.
I also just purchased online a light therapy box. I have been using it a week now and notice a huge difference in my mood and energy...I never fully understand why it works like it does, but hey...I am always willing to try anything to help with my pain!!
And family issues...well...we all have those...can't change 'em, so it's best to just love from afar those who are not supportive of us our cause us more stress. It's sad but a fact of life at times as they have their own issues to deal with. I have learned to surround myself with loving and caring people and weed out those who are full of anger or negative traits. It only frustrates me or saddens me too much. I still love them and pray for them but choose to not have them in my daily life.
Am also thinking of your sons and thank them for their service to our country!
Hang in there Pete...Take it one hour at a time when needed...Maybe try to find one thing on TV or online today that can make you laugh..It helps release those wonderful endorphins we need so much. Also go up to your wife and ask for a really long hug today!!!:)
SB and "the pup who snores loudly"
ACDF C5-C7, (no hardware), with autograft bone Nov. 2001
(reabsorption of bone 2 years later...still lost in body..expect to burp it out at anytime..haha"))
ACDF with hardware, allograft bone Nov. 2005
Anterior and Posterior CDF, allograft bone with BMP, removal of old hardware, use of titanium plates, rods, screws, & kitchen sink (lol) Dec 2006
PM since 2006