Dany your post touched me in many ways. For years I was someone's Wife,mother,sister,etc. but I was always alone in my pain no matter the number around me. I however now have raised my kids and my husband has long since been gone,I might add he was gone in a sense the 1st DX of CP but he didnt physically leave for years after. I spend a great deal of my time as you alone and like I you I use to think these forums were just not going to do the trick,how wrong I was.
I have spent the better part of the last 11 years with CP and as the folks in my life moved on into their own lives doing things I could no longer do I found myself turning more to the cyberworld and have met and retained a world like no other of friends. Dont ever think that in the dark of night when pain is all you can see that signing on here or elsewhere cant find you a angel of mercy believe me it can and has,those cyber hugs sent by many or one can be just as rewarding and just as comforting as arms that hold you but dont "feel" you Dany.
PPL in these forums can and do read you like a book at times,they know what to say when to say and when not to say anything at all,they relate to your pain and your lonliness as no other. I have had many a night or day turned around simply by signing on. I have wept tears of relief,have felt joy for others triumps,as well as shared and made memories with folks I have known only in cyberspace for years longafter my "real life" friends have moved on.
You are never alone as long as your connection is working!
I come and go in this place and others as I need to. I take from it and try to give something when I can. Everyone may not always share the same views or have the same advice and each of us here come from many different walks of life but here we have no prejudices,there are no racial or political lines to blur we are all connected simply by the pain we have and will endure,that common thread,knowledge and the ability to share where we have walked,at times crawled,failed and succeeded.
I look forward to "getting to know you" and maybe one night when that monster is all I can see you will be here when I come running.
Bilateral knee replacements,spondylosis of L-3,4,5 and S-1, osteoarthritis,premenopausal migraines.
Meds: Methadone,xanax,zanaflex,maxide,prempro,K+,indocin,lexapro,neurontin(coming off) lyrica(going onto)