not in a very good place

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Veteran Member

Date Joined Apr 2010
Total Posts : 2265
   Posted 7/14/2010 8:25 PM (GMT -6)   
I'm not in a very good place right now.  I'm in so much pain with my back and hips that I'm crying and can hardly stop.  I went and saw my PM dr. the last of last month and he increased my patch to 50mcg.  It has been working pretty well except when the weather acts up.  Well today it has been so hot and humid and we have no ac, just fans.  My husband finally set up two fans in the windows and got it cooled off in here but i'm still in a lot of pain.  I'm so depressed too.  I just don't know what to do.  I haven't felt like this in a long time.  I am so forgetful that I keep forgetting to get my antidepressant and some other meds refilled at the pharmacy.  I haven't had the antidepressants for a few days now.  I feel so helpless and i don't know how to explain it.
I'm sorry I didn't update you guys when I saw the dr.  I've been thinking about helping you all and not thinking about myself.  I hope you're all having a lpn. I just want to feel better shakehead   Here I go crying again.  i guss i will go now.  Take care everyone.
love and hugs
Dx:  ddd, spinal stenosis, bone spurs, hypothyroidism, typeII diabetes, asthma, allergies, high blood pressure, polycystic ovary syndrome, PTSD, depression, anxiety

Retired Mom
Veteran Member

Date Joined Feb 2010
Total Posts : 1753
   Posted 7/14/2010 8:32 PM (GMT -6)   
I'm very sorry that you have been having so many problems and that you are feeling so poorly right now.  I use my email calendar for reminding me of my shots at night and for reminding me about refills and sometimes even medications.  I've found that I forget my shots or can't remember if I've taken them unless I have an email reminder that I can delete once I have done them.  Perhaps there is something like that you can use to help you remember your meds.  It's really easy to set up on most email programs and can be set to send you a reminder at the same time every day, week, month, year or whatever you need.
I understand how badly you are feeling right now and how the increased pain is getting you down.  I'm right there with you in that area because my nerve ablation is wearing off and my levels have gone from a 3-4 constant with up to 10+ to a 6-7 constantly with a 10+ matter what meds I have used.  I don't want to increase any meds because I don't want to be even more "messed up" with my memory and other things.  It just seems like one step forward and two steps back.
I hope you will sleep well tonight and have a better day tomorrow.
Retired Mom

Veteran Member

Date Joined Aug 2008
Total Posts : 3193
   Posted 7/14/2010 8:36 PM (GMT -6)   

I'm sorry you are struggling :( I'm glad, though, you went in and got an increase on your patch.

I don't know what it is about depression and such - but I get like that w/ my antidepressant too... I get in a place where I'm not doing too well... then I forget to take my meds for a couple of days; or get it refilled or whatever - at a time where I need it the most! Each time I do this - and then get caught back up on it - I swear that I will never forget it again.... but it still happens from time to time. I don't know what it is. So, I completely understand... but - as I would tell myself - take those meds!! It's so hard on our bodies to crash - especially when it's a chemical change in our brains.

All that said, I pray that this dark cloud leaves you soon - and that it gets easier for you. Keep reaching out and sharing, and letting others support you through the rough times...

Hugs, Loretta :) --Tina
Main Health Issues: Dysautonomia/POTS; CFS/Fibro; Chronic Pain (back issues, migraines, carpal tunnel, among other things); Chronic Hypertension; Hypothyroidism and Hypoadrenalism; Mixed Sleep Apnea (on BiPap); Depression/Anxiety; Vitamin D Deficiency.

MAJOR surprise - Pregnant, w/ twin little girls (after six boys). Due Sept, 2010. Praying they are healthy. YES, you can have chronic pain AND have a successful pregnancy - not easy, but it can be done. :)

Forum Moderator

Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 9255
   Posted 7/14/2010 11:13 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi Loretta!

One thing I'd like to mention...most pharmacies will deliver your medications to you if you can't get out to get them, especially if you use a locally owned one and not a big chain type pharmacy. Also, if you get your prescriptions mail order (most insurance policies offer better prices if you mail order them) then they will set you up with automatic refills. That way you won't run out of meds. Going to the pharmacy can get me down just thinking about it but there are other options out there.

Please take care and if needed ask someone near you for help.
If you're going through hell, keep going.

Winston Churchill

(> <) Co-Moderator Fibromyalgia & Chronic Pain Forums
Fibromyalgia, PTSD, UC, Diabetic on insulin, collapsed disk, arthritis scattered around and a few other delights.

Mrs. Dani
Veteran Member

Date Joined Jun 2009
Total Posts : 2787
   Posted 7/15/2010 1:01 AM (GMT -6)   
   Oh gosh Loretta!
   *warm hugg* Oh goodness, are you okay? That doesnt sound good atall! Your antidepressant, is it one that causes physical dependence? Mine is, and if I laspe even just 24hrs I am not doing so good. It can cause alot of weird physical and emotional symptoms if I skipp or miss them. I really think you should call the pharmacy or even just do the voicemail / auto refill so it can be ready to pick up the next time you can get down there. We cant just stop taking our meds. We are all on such high doses of anit depressants and pain medications that lapses for 24 - 72 hours can really mess up our bodies very bad. *hugg*
    I am so sorry the high pressure systems keep heading your way. I always say that CP patients dont need to watch the news for the weather. We feel it 4 hours before it hitts every single time. sheesh. I know you are more than likly exhausted right now, but hang in there and get the meds right away. They have to re build up in your system by now, so it will take a few days to get back to normal. PLease take care and know you are in our prayers! We care so much for you! Hang in there!
TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
Chronic Pain Moderator

Veteran Member

Date Joined Feb 2010
Total Posts : 914
   Posted 7/15/2010 5:39 AM (GMT -6)   
Dear Loretta , I'm so sorry your not feeling well my friend , yes the heat and humidity is so uncomfortable . I keep a wash cloth and a large bowl with ice water and wring it out and wipe my face , arms and legs with it and it cools me off .Maybe it would help you cool off too . I hope you feel better soon , both of us in fact , take good care of you . Mikel

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2009
Total Posts : 2042
   Posted 7/15/2010 8:55 AM (GMT -6)   
Loretta, if the reason you do not have AC is because you can not afford to buy one join your local Freecycle Group and make a wanted post for a window air conditioner. You never know, but someone might have one sitting around collecting dust they never think about until they trip over it...LOL. If you don't have one because you rent and your landlord won't allow a window unit to be installed ask about a portable AC.
2 confirmed herniated lumbar discs. Spinal Arthritis. Spinal Stenosis, diabetic peripheral nueropathy.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Apr 2010
Total Posts : 2265
   Posted 7/15/2010 10:06 AM (GMT -6)   
Thank you all so much for the support.  You're all such great friends, shoot family.  I just called and got all my meds in to get them refilled.  I never forget my pain meds, it always seems to be the antidepressants.
Thanks for the idea Jim.  I am a member of the Buffalo freecycle.  I put in a wanted for an ac almost a month ago and no one has responded.  We rent an apartment, so I guess I could look up one on Ebay and see how much they are there.
I am feeling a little better this morning.  You all take care and i hope you all have a lpd
Dx: osteoarthritis, bursitis in left hip,  ddd, spinal stenosis, bone spurs, hypothyroidism, typeII diabetes, asthma, allergies, high blood pressure, polycystic ovary syndrome, PTSD, depression, anxiety

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2009
Total Posts : 2042
   Posted 7/15/2010 10:46 AM (GMT -6)   
Also if you haven't done so check Craigslist. You may be able to find something there within your budget.
2 confirmed herniated lumbar discs. Spinal Arthritis. Spinal Stenosis, diabetic peripheral nueropathy.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jan 2010
Total Posts : 1097
   Posted 7/15/2010 12:10 PM (GMT -6)   
Loretta, I am sorry to hear you've been struggling so much with the pain in your back and hips. I hope that the weather stabilizes, so you can get some relief from the heat. If you have Magic Bags, you can freeze them as well - I do that and put one under my neck to cool me off when sleeping.

I'm glad you've got all your meds now...and I hope you get back on track soon with the anti-depressant. I'm thinking of you and sending a one deserves to hurt like you're hurting and I wish there was more I could do to help you.

Know that you're in my prayers...and I hope that helps.

Conditions: Fibromyalgia, Severe Myofascial Pain, Chronic Pelvic Pain (with permanent muscle damage), Femoroacetabular Impingement (CAM and Pincer), Reynauds, IBS, Surgical Adhesions, Ophthalmic Migraines, Severe Hot Flashes (both Surgical Menopause and medication related), plus physically unable to vomit due to the Nissen, and I have extremely tiny veins with a lot of scar tissue...a joy when it comes to having to give blood or get an IV started

Surgeries: Appendix, Uterus, Nissen Fundoplication for GERD, Left Ovary, Gallbladder, Right Ovary, TVT

Medications: Oxycontin, Cesamet, Tramacet, Cymbalta, Flexeril and Clonidine plus Laxaday, Vitamin D and a Multi-Vitamin daily

Veteran Member

Date Joined Mar 2008
Total Posts : 3089
   Posted 7/15/2010 4:11 PM (GMT -6)   
(((((Loretta)))))))). I hope you are feeling better today. It has been incredibly hot and humid for the last two weeks where I live in New England, so I can relate to your weather problems. Fortunately though, I do have a window AC unit in my bedroom. I don't know how I could have gotten through last week's stim trial without it, as I wasn't allowed to shower, so it was really hard to cool off.

I don't know about where you are, but around here, some of the larger towns have "cooling centers" where people without AC can go to cool off. I think they are just like a community center type thing, but something like that might be an option for you. I know it's not ideal, but maybe spending an hour or two there during the hottest part of the day will help you get through.


Veteran Member

Date Joined Jun 2005
Total Posts : 610
   Posted 7/15/2010 6:19 PM (GMT -6)   

I wonder if you have the same thing I do, I'm not exactly to EXACT name of it, but it's like SAD (seasonal affective disorder) EXCEPT it's something like reverse SAD, where we get more depressed during the summer months, I really think it's due to having TOO much sun, where as SAD is from not enough sunlight. But then again, I think depression can get us no matter the weather, especially if it's causing us more pain.

ALSO, you should really try not running out of your antidepressants, I know when I run out I get really sick from it's withdrawals, but sometimes you don't realize what your having is anti-Ds withdrawal. I get VERY fatigued, nausea, brain zaps, and more depressed. But like others have said, you can find a small ma and pop pharmamcy, they sometimes still deliver, also RiteAid has mailed meds to me once when I was very ill and couldn't come get them.

But either way, I hope you get your airconditioner thing figured out, I wish I could offer some advise there, but I have no experience with it. But WHY dont you have air conditioning if you live in an apartment?? that should be the land lords duty to make sure you have something for this severe heat.

Please don't cry, we're here for you, and we all have been there. I know about tough times, as just recently my niece died from SIDs, then 5 days ago my grandmother died, everyone around me seems to be dying and it's taking a toll out on me. I seem to wake up every morning lately around 5am (before the kids wake up) and just cry for an hour, but I've never dealt with death before til these past few months, so I know about depression and pain, as now I'm being told by my doctor that I may have RA, so I know how it feels to have everything hit us at once, just isnt fair....


Carmen~*~*~Chronic Pain Moderator

DX-Chronic Pain due to two freak car accidents, Pancreatic Divisum, Fibromyalgia, Asthma, Depression w/anxiety, Migraines, and Kids!!!

Meds- Suboxone 16mg for pain, Cymbalta 60mg, prilosec, Zyrtec, ProAir inhaler, and the best medication is my puppy, kitty, and 5 guinea pigs!!!


Regular Member

Date Joined Jan 2010
Total Posts : 221
   Posted 7/15/2010 9:20 PM (GMT -6)   
I've been on pain patches at a much higher dose and have had pain break through meds too .. if they are not working .et your doc know!
Also, I started to taking Nortrytiptyline (spelling?) which at 50 mg has kept much of muscle and joint pain at bay ... but is a an anti-depressent when used at higher doses ... maybe doing off your meds for a few days has an impact on your pain centers?
Just a few ideas to think about... and we are all here for you ... and we have been where you are .. so we understand. Be patient with youself and those around you... they don't really understand it unless they live with it like we do every day.
45-single mom of 18, 20 & 22-year old sons, diagnosed with Crohn's in 2004 via pill camera    6MP kicked into remission (along with modified diet) so went off in 2006. Mistake.
2009/2010 ileitus and hospitalization - now on 100 mg Imuran. Currently taking 5 mg prednisone until increase in Imuran kicks in following recent dx of Crohn's in esophogus and mouth. Trying gluten free diet now.
Working and trying to date online!

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