And welcome to the Family! I know most of the stories here do sound depressing but think of it this way ~ How may forums are there where people share all of the good health care they have gotten or celebrate how wonderful they feel? It's human nature to get frustrated and talk about
the things that go wrong as opposed to those that go right. By sharing the bad, as well as the good, we are better able to help each other because we know what each other is going through. Who else better to teach a blind person than another blind person?!! ;-)
Your lifestyle sounds wonderful, even if you can't enjoy it like you once did. I used to have a farm complete with a Palomino named Candy. She was a doll and a very gentle ride. I didn't give up the farm because of health but when I remarried. But I would think that with some self-care and great doctors to help, I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that, I would think you'd be able to ride again now and then. Have you ever seen the handicapped kids who they take riding? I'm not saying any of us are like them but there are ways and breeds of horses that are much more gentle on our bodies than others. I don't know what breed you have but the Walkers and also the ...umm, can't think of the name...<grrrrr>...lol (see what fibromyalgia does to the brain?) The horses that prance up and down, Spanish/Mexican origin, very gentle ride....
OK, just spent 20 minutes finding the name of the breed...it's Paso Fino! They are wonderful horses and purported to have an easier ride than a Walker or a Morgan. I've seen them preforming on TV (RFD-TV) but never in person, yet. They are truly beautiful and claims that they are the softest ride with the least amount of movement for the rider. Here's a link if you just enjoy looking at beautiful horses. www.pfha.org/content/about/PasoHorse.aspx
Also, one thing I strongly suggest when people have a doctor who has pretty much given up on them is to get to a teaching/university hospital and get yourself on the cutting edge of technology. There's a link for a list of hospitals around the globe but here's the link so you don't have to go find it. Give the closest one a call and tell them what your needs are. It's why they exist. en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_university_hospitals
Also give some thought to other ways you can work with horses while you are trying to get help with your back. Walking them? Grooming, feeding and lunge work. Maybe volunteer with an organization who takes disabled kids for rides while you walk the horse. In the mean time you have time to heal and hopefully one day it will be you back in that saddle again.
One more thing before I turn this into a complete chapter or an entire book...lol... Talk to your doctor about
possibly applying for disability. There is NO reason you have to feel embarrassed or ashamed to be in pain. You should NEVER be afraid to go to work because you have Chronic Pain. It's no different that someone who has a broken leg or cancer. Who would belittle them? And your darling husband needs some education. Also he needs to go along with you on your adventure to find a doctor or clinic who has some hope for you. As my husband and I remind each other...we made the deal when we got married (and we hold up our hand with the wedding ring on it) We are there to HELP each other...helping is a physical manifestation of Love. If he isn't willing to see your life through your eyes then take yourself to a pain counselor. Yep, there are counselors who deal with pain patients and many of the members here are benefited enormously from seeing one.
OK, I'm off to retrieve another load of dry laundry. Please take care and stay in touch!
Moderator on the Fibromyalgia and Chronic Pain forums
“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.” Albert Einstein