help dealing with elderly parents and pain

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stumped by pain
Regular Member

Date Joined Feb 2011
Total Posts : 23
   Posted 2/22/2011 10:00 AM (GMT -6)   
Good morning all. The weather in tx is changin again...
 So im still waiting for doc office to call with appt for trail with stim. gee's ... the waiting.
 We get to do alot of waiting. Im waiting for pain meds to kick in this morning for sure. PC gave me new pain med to start on thursday not sure what it is couldnt read writing just took it to pharmacy will find out thursday.  hope it works better.
 So got some good insite on the stages of this thing call CP what an eye opener for me. explains alot more then just feeling sad or mad . Thks Scarred for info.
  Denial plays a big part...If you have elderly parents an have been primary care giver to them as well as tring to stay in low pain day you can understand.
  If ya'll have any imput on that it would be great. my father dosent seem to understand when i say i cant today...
  he is still recovring himself from anurisium 2 yrs staff in bed sore on foot an broke that ft left him in wheelchair an no ft. I would do anything to help him and have to the point that i hurt so bad that i go to bed an cry.
  My hubbys mom lives out here on our land in here little trailer and she still does pretty good just dont drive. my father on other hand well hes home bound. got home health comin an my brother and his daughter moved in there(just cause he wont keep  place of his own) but he still calles me to do thing for him everyday.
 It makes me feel so bad to say i cant do it today .

Regular Member

Date Joined Feb 2011
Total Posts : 93
   Posted 2/22/2011 10:35 AM (GMT -6)   
Hi stumped by pain. I can see the love you have for your parents in what you've written. It's hard when pain prevents you from being able to care for those you love. And even harder when they don't understand. I cannot give you a magic fix. All I can offer is encouragement to stay the course. Your heart is in the right place. You are giving of yourself in a way most people will probably never truly understand. Caring for others opens us to pain beyond physical, but it's so important, don't lose that wonderful person you are. By the same token, know your limits. If you increase your daily pain trying to give everything, you will be able to give less and less. Find the balance and hold in there. And get help wherever you can. I'll be rooting for you.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Aug 2006
Total Posts : 9664
   Posted 2/22/2011 10:54 AM (GMT -6)   
Can you get your father into a retirement community it's not the same as a rest home, as
a person living in a retirement community has their own little apartment type room and they have a shared
meal time either lunch or dinner and they can have people look in on your father as well, so he'd
be better looked at and still have his own little place. it's something to consider at least, and some of
these do have progressive care attached to them so if they need a true nursing home type
setting..I can also see that you do love your parents a lot, but having to care for them when we can't,
well please look into other options that are out there...will be thinking of you, hope you can get your stim soon...
((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((stumped by pain)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
healing hugz and well wishes...
* So many dx's I could write a book* "It would be nice if we could use the edit button in real life"...
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