New Topic Post Reply Printable Version
[ << Previous Thread | Next Thread >> ]

luckyflowers
Regular Member


Date Joined May 2011
Total Posts : 164
   Posted 6/9/2011 10:55 PM (GMT -6)   
Since I know your always so busy tending to ME and others, I wanted to see how your feeling and doing? Support and caring goes both ways..so how are you? The good, the bad and the ugly....lets hear it :)
 
Hugs!
 
 
 
Dx: Herniated disk in my neck C6-C7, Degenerative disc disease and arthritis in my neck, sciatica, RLS, migraines and post-op RNY gastric by pass and depression.

Meds: Oxy, Nortriptyline, percocet, norco, xanax(as needed), sinement, topamax, imitrex, and paxil

Personal: Single mom 43yrs old to three children- two girls 5 and 13 and my son 16yrs old. I work fulltime.

Snowbunny21
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2010
Total Posts : 3557
   Posted 6/10/2011 8:32 AM (GMT -6)   
Awww...you are such a sweetie!!! Thank you for caring about me:)

I am doing fairly well....it's pretty much steady as she goes with my pain and it's a 5-7 most days depending on level of activity...But as I think SE or Whitebeard...can't remember who said this lately...but that pain level 10 years ago would have me curled up in a ball in bed...but it's become the 'new normal'...

I see my PM every 3 months for a check in...But we actually talk on the phone once in awhile or go for coffee as we have become friends over the years...

It's been so interesting for me to learn what it is like on the other side of the coin for him being the Dr....He is an Anethesiologist now in PM....And he never reveals any information about particular patients to always adhere to HIPAA regulations....But he can speak in generalities what his day is like as well as what he is learning about new medicine or treatments coming in the next years..

I have still been going back and forth about whether I am going to go for disability....or try to go back to work....It's such a hard decision for me and I've been wrestling for some time now...because on occasion I will wake up and feel good 'inside'...full of energy and brain alert ready to go....but of course my body has other ideas...LOL...

It's when I have one good day with pain level of 5 and think..."I can do this...push through the pain, I can work and just rest when I get home"....and then halfway through a day of running errands or volunteer work, and I am in terrible pain up to a 7 and feel defeated..

My PM has said that I should be on full disability starting years ago...he gets upset when I push too hard...as we all do!...and that he thinks with the 3 fusions and a pituitary brain tumor..it would be fairly easy to get accepted...I don't know if I could make it finance wise...I live outside of Washington DC..so it's unfortunately an expensive area...and I help my mom during the week...

I'm just pretty stubborn:) and I know it's not 'giving up' per say...it's just I have to reconcile this with my thought process as it's a personal decision we all have to make...

I admire ALL those on here that are either on disability...or are still working...I know either decision is so difficult to make!

Ok..rambled enough...Thanks again for thinking of me:)...I hope you are having a low pain day and getting used to the medicine and maybe even got some sleep last night??? I hope!!!:)

This board is a true blessing as I love to try and help when I can..and get support as well..

Hugs (( ))

tmjpain
Veteran Member


Date Joined Oct 2008
Total Posts : 2024
   Posted 6/10/2011 8:50 AM (GMT -6)   
Hi Snowbunny, I'm glad to see you are hanging in there.

I understand about your decision re job or disability. I worked in severe pain for more than a year before
going off on sick leave which turned into disability two times. My body just crashed and i was never able to get out of bed to go back to work. Now recently i received a letter from my hospital, I am a registered nurse at a children's hosp., stating that my position has been terminated. Oh boy that
hits hard. I knew it was going to come but didn't know when. I have had a very tough time with this and letting it go. It was my dream job in my dream hospital. I was there for 25 yrs.

Now after talking to a union rep, she tells me that they can't let me go like that as it is against the law of human rights to do this while i am on disability. So I need to file a grievance. But honestly I know i can't return
unless a miracle happens to me. I would just keep my dental plan, which is still need to get bridges done and more gum grafting surgery.

So anyways, i can really feel for you girl. I too suffer high pain levels at all times and I have nothing to
take for pain. I have done it all and nothing has ever worked over the last eleven years.

You're doing a great job Snowbunny. You are a strong and courageous woman. And thank you for all the support
you are giving on this forum. It is a wonderful place isn't it!!

I know that you will come to the right decision for you. Just listen to your body.

Hugs
Suzane

Snowbunny21
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2010
Total Posts : 3557
   Posted 6/10/2011 9:11 AM (GMT -6)   
Suzane...thank you for such a wonderful post and sharing more of your story! I can't imagine what it's like for you with nothing for the pain...bless your heart...that must be so difficult!...I feel very blessed to have my Dr. that's for sure...he actually wants me on stronger doses but I want to always take as little as possible to keep my tolerance low...

Yep...some people just kind of 'like' their jobs but it's not their passion...so when it is...it's that much harder to not be doing this anymore...I'm sure you were a fantastic nurse as you have so much compassion for others!!!

I'm glad you will file that grievance and not let them get away with that...as you said...it's more about the principal and legality of it all as you can't return...

My job was in non-profit fundraising as well as mission work here in the US and Africa. I would travel somewhere almost every month or so...and like you...loved every second of it...In between my 2nd and 3rd surgery which was only less than one year, I did my last two major trips which was to Mississippi to help rebuild homes after Katrina...I led a group of high schoolers taking 3 weeks off their summer vacation to go and help those effected. Up at 5am...sleep at midnight...

And then another trip to Africa which takes 3 different planes, a helicopter ride, then a 10 hour bus trip to get to the remote village!...It makes me cry to think of those beautiful children and adults who I got to know over the years and months I would spend with them...they were my family!!!

As I couldn't have children of my own...all these last 13 years with my youth group kids...who are all grown up now out of college!!! And my kids in Africa that I can't hug them:(...but thank goodness for FB now!...At least I see my youth group 'kids' when they come back home to visit..

I'm sure there are many stories like ours on here where people had to give up their dream jobs...

I really am praying for you too Suzane...I know it's not everything..but you can know that you helped so many people through the years in your job and helped save lives...comfort those in pain...made someone laugh..or held their hand when no one else was there...I applaud those in health care...I just wish you could get the help YOU need!!!

Sending big hugs (( ))

Post Edited (Snowbunny21) : 6/10/2011 9:22:54 AM (GMT-6)


luckyflowers
Regular Member


Date Joined May 2011
Total Posts : 164
   Posted 6/10/2011 8:25 PM (GMT -6)   
SB,

I understand what your saying about your pain level, and it is so great to have that kind of 'relationship" with your Dr. I am on a first name basis with the kids pediatrician. He used to call once a week etc...its so nice. I have really enjoyed getting to know you and I think you have a wealth of information. I know in the end we are all responsible for ourselves and to make sure we get the care we need and deserve.

The whole issue with disability has got to weigh so heavy on your soul...It does sound like you would qualify that is for sure. But of course no one can tell you what to do on that one, but you know that! You just really have to come to a point where you make that decision and your totally comfortable with the choice you make.


Please make sure that you reach out for support when you need it! I hope you have a great weekend.


Hug!!
Dx: Herniated disk in my neck C6-C7, Degenerative disc disease and arthritis in my neck, sciatica, RLS, migraines and post-op RNY gastric by pass and depression.

Meds: Oxy, Nortriptyline, percocet, norco, xanax(as needed), sinement, topamax, imitrex, and paxil

Personal: Single mom 43yrs old to three children- two girls 5 and 13 and my son 16yrs old. I work fulltime.

luckyflowers
Regular Member


Date Joined May 2011
Total Posts : 164
   Posted 6/10/2011 8:34 PM (GMT -6)   
Suzane,

Yes, thank you for sharing. I can't imagine going that long without meds to help with the pain. That just blows my mind. It sounds like your doing a great job as well. Of course I have a million thoughts and questions but I am sure you have thought of them all.

At least you can come here for support and friendship! Hang in there!!!


Hugs!
Dx: Herniated disk in my neck C6-C7, Degenerative disc disease and arthritis in my neck, sciatica, RLS, migraines and post-op RNY gastric by pass and depression.

Meds: Oxy, Nortriptyline, percocet, norco, xanax(as needed), sinement, topamax, imitrex, and paxil

Personal: Single mom 43yrs old to three children- two girls 5 and 13 and my son 16yrs old. I work fulltime.
New Topic Post Reply Printable Version
Forum Information
Currently it is Tuesday, June 19, 2018 5:09 AM (GMT -6)
There are a total of 2,973,244 posts in 326,190 threads.
View Active Threads


Who's Online
This forum has 160973 registered members. Please welcome our newest member, somna534.
296 Guest(s), 5 Registered Member(s) are currently online.  Details
kimbo62, tickbite666, doug9801, somna534, ljimd