Camping last weekend was a success, but I had only one good day, Saturday, and it was only in the morning. I have such a loving family group. My boys and fiance helped with everything, packing, loading, planning meals, then cooking, washing up, taking turns getting water, escorting me to the handicapped family bathroom to shower on the shower seat (with a mat under me of course) and using the higher toilets. No one complained, even on the night of 6 trips to the bathroom. My fiance is a trooper, always carrying the flashlight and supporting me with his arm. I couldn't have asked for better. Even with the pain, it was a relaxing trip of reading, gentle walking, swimming and rest.
My patches are giving me no relief right now. It feels like there is another ovarian cyst on the right side, my hormones are out of control causing PMS like symptoms and cramping. I haven't had this for years since my hysterectomy. I am tired and see the Gyn surgeon on the 20th. I don't think I can wait that long. I called both him and the PM doc today trying to explain the new pain and am waiting for return calls. My breakthrough meds give about an hour of relief then quit on me. This is the 5th day of this ripping pain. I am not walking around for fear I will faint in front of my sons and scare them. There are moments that I have to step aside from reading or typing to reorient myself. I get foggy a lot.
I know others are suffering too, Loretta, our new member renren with withdrawals and medications, Jim with his lack of Cymbalta that helped him so much, Tina and so many others. I am sorry if I missed your name. Its not so much depression that I am feeling right now, just a large dose of unhappiness that my body is going through this again. The upheaval and struggle is so far from where I want to be. It doesn't help either that family are causing issues about the wedding, which is 3 months away, over a simple request. I am unable and unwilling to meet everyone's expectations for what they want because there is no way to make them happy. The ones that we are able to fulfill that fit with what we want, we are doing. I refuse to attempt to make others happy with our wedding, because there is no pleasing some people. Its also our wedding that we are paying for and my only responsibility is to myself and my fiance. The good old standby threat came out, "I just won't come." My response was that was fine, their presence would not be missed. I also lost my temper in front of my future mother-in-law on the phone with my fiance. So I am trying not to focus on any of that while the pain is so bad.
I cant even crochet at the moment. My hands are swelling too much to hold the tiny threads and hooks.
Sometimes the best place for me physically is my bed, but I want to be a part of my family, not stuck in my room.
Hope you are all having better days, happy times, and enjoying the weather (good or bad) today.