Hi Randy, nini53/Kathy here this is the perfect place to vent, so never apologize for venting, we all do at one time or another. I am coming up on my year anniversary of joining HW, which my youngest daughter found for me, and when I got on, I felt like I had come home. Its very difficult to explain to people who do not have cp how difficult it is to live with cp day by day. Here, sadly we all know what it feels like.
I am very sorry you sound like you are really having a difficult time of it. Its frustrating when even your doctor or doctors dont know whats going on with you. As for doing things with your children, I know well how you feel, its been 12+ years since I have been disabled and it took me almost 2 years to get out of bed unless I was going to my doctor. All I can tell you is even though you cannot do the things you once did, you will find that there are other outlets for you. I am not trying to say its easy, its not, its very hard, but after 2 years in bed, I knew I had to get up and start doing something. My girls were in there teens when I finally had to stop working, but they had been through years of me saying, "I cant do that, my back". My grandchildren have never known anything but grandma saying "sorry, grandma cant do that", but there are still many things I can do with them.
Take care, and good luck with finding out what going on with you,
degenerative disc disease, fibromyalgia, osteoarthritis, neuropathy, lumbar laminectomy july 1998 no help, rechargeable neurostimulator unit low right back w/lead wires to left side and right leg unit not working just sitting there.i am 57 years young in may will turn 58. i have 2 grown daughters, 25 and 29. i have 2 grandchildren, 9 year old grandaughter and 5 yr. old grandson