I know how you feel.
We both have almost the same post.
I am almost same as you: with a flare up of my symptoms, and with more pain.
The lost of my mom was the most important lost in my life, because a mother is the most lovely person for anyone. I remember her all the days.
I am a God believer, and this is my relief when I think in my mother. I don´t know if you believe in God , but it is a good choice, believe me.
Lets listen the advice of the good people in this forum.
I want to send you a lot of hugs from Spain.