Ann I know things are really tough for you right now, and when your really hurting it makes it all that much harder, but believe me it will pass and it will get better! I know when I had that posterior fusion in my neck and they put in the rods and pins in it. I was in allot of pain for a very long time, and I to went through a period a few weeks after the surgery, wondering if I had made a mistake having it done. Ann it wasn't till I started physical therapy, and it was, even then a few more weeks into it, before the pain started letting up and I started to feel that maybe I done the right thing after all! But it was along time after the surgery before I felt that way! Heck even with this pain pump surgery I had, and I had that just a couple of days before your surgery I think. My stomach is still really sore where they put the pump in! The incision has healed really well, but I bumped my belly on the back of the recliner, right where the pump is, and I thought I was going to go through the roof, talk about
hurt and pain!!!
Anyway Ann when all is said and done, you can't go back, and all you can do now is just keep moving forward! "What if's" doesn't do you any good, so now you just have to force your self to put on your positive thinking hat, and tell yourself that your going to get through this, and it will be all right in the end! One way or another it will work out! Even if it is not exactly the way you might have planned it! Right now, Just take one day at a time, and know that we are all here for you!