I'm feeling kind of down today, and I just need to vent. I had a long, difficult winter with my Crohn's and Salmonella. In the process, I lost about
25 pounds, (still losing) and went from a size 12 to an 8. In the process, I have been to my GI multiple times, and I have gotten to know the staff well. So my sister convinced me to buy a whole new wardrobe..( I was frumping around in my giant clothes, because money is tight, and I kept thinking I would get better soon and probably gain my weight back) I do look good, and I have gotten used to all of the comments by acquaintances, but I was totally floored, when I showed up to my GI appointment today and heard comments from the nurse, receptionist, and even the doc, about
how FABULOUS I look. I tried to give them feedback that:
A. I lost five pounds since my visit a month ago, and I still don't feel all that great
B. That they of all people have watched me suffer for months on end; they should be worried about the weight loss...not celebrating it!!!!!
So I got thinking what happens next...will I keep losing and get stick thin and look sick?.....will I need Prednisone again and get really heavy?....will I feel better (my vote) and be a little overweight (which is what I think is my normal self)
I don't know if I am expressing myself well enough. I'm just so tired of not feeling well. I just wish weight didn't matter so much...it makes me feel misunderstood. I don't even know what I'm trying to say...maybe I'm just wanting hugs for being me, in whatever size I come in!!!!