Totally OT - Would you want to know

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   Posted 6/4/2008 6:32 PM (GMT -7)   
On Halloween, my neighbor stopped by asking if I had seen her cat.  It had gone missing.  I hadn't seen it.  My dog has brought home some deer parts so I figured the coyotes may have got it.  Today my dog ran off into the woods and I chased after it.  She thought it was fun so we went deeper and deeper into the woods behind my house.  We got to a stone wall that had barbed wire over it. There was a furry carcass hanging from it.  I think it might be the long gone remains of my neighbors cat.  Part of me feel I should tell her that her kitty has gone on the greener pastures.  But it has been so long that she probably assumes he is never coming home anyway.  By not telling her she may think someone adopted him thinking he was a stray or something.  Who knows if a coyote got it and lost it on the wire or if the cat got tangled on the wire and died.  I wouldn't want her thinking her cat died a long slow death.  So I think I just wont say anything.  I am not even sure it is her cat anyway, nor do I see her that often. 

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   Posted 6/4/2008 6:46 PM (GMT -7)   
Fitzy, silence is golden sweetie....

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   Posted 6/4/2008 6:49 PM (GMT -7)   
Thats what I figured... I'll keep my big mouth shut lol. I hadn't realized how long it had been missing till I started typing this and remembered that when she came to the door I thought she was a trick or treater.

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   Posted 6/4/2008 7:28 PM (GMT -7)   
My 13 year old tom cat died under my next door neighbors front hedge some winters ago. He did not find the remains until the following summer while trimming the hedge. I wish he had not told me nor shown me, for it broke my heart to see he had died alone. Although I do realize animals sometimes "disappear" when they are about to die. I suspected this had been what happened but I still wish I didn't know about it. Keep a lid on need for her to greive twice.
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   Posted 6/4/2008 8:30 PM (GMT -7)   
i understand your thought of "maybe they would want to know", i would think the same way, too. but then i think about my kitties and if i would want to know they died a horrible death ...i would not want to picture that's how they died :(

but that's nice you thought of them, it is a delicate subject imo :(
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Date Joined Dec 2007
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   Posted 6/5/2008 4:01 PM (GMT -7)   
Nope, don't tell. Sometimes not telling is a gift. After the cat has been gone a while the owner will develop her own idea as to what happened. The one she is best able to cope with. Telling her the trueth won't enable her to do anything about it just make her unhappy.

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   Posted 6/5/2008 7:51 PM (GMT -7)   
I was in a similar situation when I found a cat's body on my property and then saw an ad at the grocery store for a missing cat. I was going to call because it fit the description of the cat I found. I just happened to ask my son (college age) if I should and he said what everyone has said here, no don't call. I took his advice but I think I would want to be called and be able to decide if it was my cat or not. I would rather know my cat was dead than always wonder if it would ever come home. I've had both situations with cats I've had and much prefer closure. My solution now is never to let my cat outside. It's just not worth the risk.
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Date Joined May 2005
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   Posted 6/5/2008 8:20 PM (GMT -7)   
Thanks Root. If she was actively looking I would tell but too much time has passed now. But I really appreciate your input and don't feel so guilty for immediatly thinking "oh I should go tell her."

Regular Member

Date Joined Dec 2006
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   Posted 6/5/2008 8:34 PM (GMT -7)   
I think if it were my cat, I would definitely want to know. I just had to put my dog to sleep today- he had Lyme disease, which caused kidney failure- and I feel better knowing that he's at peace. Maybe you could tell her without giving the details, just so she can have some peace.

Regular Member

Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 330
   Posted 6/6/2008 2:27 AM (GMT -7)   
Zazucat - I'm so sorry to hear about your dog. The loss of a pet can be so hard. They give such unconditional love. <<<<HUGS>>>>

On Mother's Day this year, someone hit a cat with their car in front of our home. It was still alive and suffering when I found it (the car kept right on going). I tried to find a vet that could help it, but on a Sunday night I was unable to find it help before it succumbed. We buried it at our farm amongst pets of ours that have passed. I told the owner of the local village store that if anyone came in looking for a lost cat to put them in touch with me. So far - no inquiries. The cat was well cared for so it wasn't feral. I wish I could have talked to the owner - at least to find out the cat's name. Right now if I go by the "grave", I can only call it "Kitty". It bothers me.

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   Posted 6/6/2008 4:01 AM (GMT -7)   
I do have to admit that if I knew my cat died hanging on a fence that would bother me knowing it died that way.

Bentwhistle- that was so caring what you did and made me feel better about the cats we had that never came home. We once found two little kittens that had died under pine trees on our property and we buried them in our pet's cemetery as well. Now we are moving and I feel bad having to leave them all behind
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Veteran Member

Date Joined May 2005
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   Posted 6/6/2008 7:44 AM (GMT -7)   
Yeah if I was to ever say anything it would just be that I found it deceased. NO DETAILS. I might try to get out there with my hubby at some point and bury it but it is so far gone now I am sure it would be disgusting.

Elite Member

Date Joined Jan 2005
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   Posted 6/6/2008 8:33 AM (GMT -7)   
I know I would not want to know the details and if you do go and bury it
I applaud you for doing something so kind and so sweet

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Regular Member

Date Joined Oct 2007
Total Posts : 289
   Posted 6/8/2008 5:54 AM (GMT -7)   

First,Zazucat,soooo very sorry of your loss,I had to put my 16 yo kitty down in December,it was horrible.

Three years ago,when we moved,my cat jumped out of a window,and we never saw him again,it was devastating,personally I would like to think that someone nice found him,probaly not,but the thought that he was "attacked" would be too much for me,so I agree with most here,silence may be the best in this case,but,how nice of you to really think about your friends feelings :-)

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