So next week will be my last week tapering down. I should be thrilled right? Well, part of me is. I can get rid of this moon face, and lose the pounds I packed on. Not to mention these awful leg cramps I've been getting. But part of me is scared. So far I haven't flared up again, but I feel like I'm just waiting for it to happen again. Especially the odd swelling of my lip and thumb that I had. Seems like I'm always checking out my lips to see that they look normal, or comparing fingers to see if they look swollen. The lower I go on the pred, the more I worry about
these things. I can drive myself bonkers, and everyone around me too! I'd like to say not worry about
things that may never happen again, or that I can't control. But easier said then done.
I know that's just the way it goes with Crohn's. We have no idea when it's going to rear it's ugly head again, or even if sometimes it's doing damage to us and we don't know it yet. I guess I'm just having a hard time dealing with the uncertainty right now. I'm the type of person who likes control, and with this I always feel like I have none (because well, I don't! LOL). Anyone else feel that way from time to time? I'm hoping once I'm off the pred for a while, and if things go well I'll be able to relax again about it (until next time of course!).