This happens to most of us. Please vent all you want, because we do understand how you feel. You want to do something so bad, but it is just like all the "stuffing" got taken out of you.
As to the gifts order online (don't waste your precious energy going shopping, as much as I certainly enjoy it). I have gotten to the point that I have had to get a cleaning service to come in once a week for about an hour for me. They do my house chores (like laundry, sweeping, dusting, and laundry) because I can no longer do them without needing a day to recover. Completely worth the 30 bucks (small 1 bedroom apt) I pay a week, so I have the energy to do the things that I enjoy.
I have also given in, and I'm going to get someone to clean every 2 weeks. I feel somewhat guilty about
it, even though both my wife and I work full-time. I find that often I have a choice on the weekend between getting the cleaning chores done, or going for a walk, or going to the golf range, and cleaning always wins because I HAVE to get it done. I don't have the energy to do both, at least without making my legs shake from fatigue afterwards.
Navy, you said laundry twice, heehee. Have lots do you? :)
Dx'ed in 1999. No surgeries.
Current meds: 100 mg 6MP. Just finished prednisone taper. Udo's Choice Probiotics (30 billion).
Betaine, digestive enzymes, Candicin (oil of oregano capsules), Beta Sitosterol.