I am sorry for your troubles. This is such a frustrating disease. I too, am fat and "don't look sick", even though my insides are in agony.
I live in Manitoba. I can highly recommend Dr. Charles Bernstein as a top notch GI. He works out of the Health Sciences Centre in Winnipeg and is known around the world for his expertise in Crohn's Disease. You have to wait a long time to see him but it is worth it.
I can't help with your second question. I am a nurse and I guess I accomodated myself by going from full time to part time. Of course, this didn't hurt my employer, it only hurt me with a subsequent loss of income. I was off work for a year back in 2006, trying for disability. I ended up on welfare for 6 months because my claim wasn't accepted and have been struggling financially ever since. I, too am interested to hear work/disability stories from other Canadians. Good luck in the future.