Hi...I can relate I think to what your saying. Much of my younger years, I was pretty cetain I did not want kids. Then when I reached my 30s, I started thinking one would be great. My now husband and I talked about
it before we got married and thought one would make us very happy....than I had some fistula complications, some thoughts about
serious meds & concerns about
my age and strength.
It came down to we have decided not to have kids (we were 38 & 41 years old when we got married). I have to say, I still wish I had one. I think that despite exhaustion and problems, I could have been a good Mom.
It sounds like you care enough to be a good parent too. I don't think that your illness would make for a bad childhood for a child....kids are very flexible and learn what is "normal" from their environment. Your child would just know that Mom gets tired, but would also likely learn to relish in Mom's good days (just like you should).
I believe in being practical, but my practicality made me decide against kids. I think I was too practical. I would hate to see this disease be your sole decision maker.
Sorry not much help, but I have been very emotional about
this isssue with myself lately. I hope I could give you some later in age perspective.
Dx'd '90 (emergency rupture), symptoms ignored long before that, '03 fistulas and bad flagyl reactions, B12 weekly, Pentasa [until I surrender to the bigger meds]
I'm riding on the escalator of life....