I have been extremely lucky. My husband and I had the same views on one of us being home most of the time with our kids, that made taking care of myself a bit easier. If I had had to work full time to support myself and my children things would not have been the same, and I know that. BUT, you can not take care of anything else, if you don't take care of YOU first.
In answer to your questions, most of the time, my husband is very understanding. He is an extremely active person, and seriously, I doubt anyone could keep up with him. So he certainly doesn't expect me to. But I do pretty well. We always have very active vacations, and I pull my weight around the house as far as the work load. I do tend to veg out at night. He will often times be off for a run or exercising, but then we will sit and watch a movie or tv later.
2 of my resections were because I was not responding to the medicines that were available at the time. The middle one was due to scar tissue. So while none of them were my "choice", none of them were emergency either. I also believe that the end result was that I was given the chance to enjoy life again. Those years were not the best. Once we found the right medication and have gotten things under control, my CD has been much more manageable.
I do believe you can have most things you want, you just might not be able to have them all in one day, or all at once. While the opportunities are available to you, it might not be the right time for you if it makes things more difficult for you in the long run. As I said earlier, you need to be gentle with yourself and take time to rest. I am a firm believer in things happening for a reason, and if you need to pass an opportunity up, there might be a better one around the corner later.
CD 20 years officially, 30 unofficially. 3 resections '93, '95 '97
Managing with strict low residue diet, keeping symptoms to a minimum. All test show small amount of ulceration, still have occasional blockages. But still have a great time with my 2 daughters and husband!
Prednisone, 6MP,Prevacid, B12 shots, Bentyl, Xifaxan.....