I know I'm still relatively new here, and I feel strange asking for a pep talk, but here goes.
I've had CD for at least five years (probably a lot longer) and am currently in what is now a five month flare up. Tomorrow is colonoscopy/endoscopy day. I went through a colonoscopy once five years ago, which is how I was diagnosed, but it hasn't stopped me from being incredibly nervous, even 24 hours before. It's like... on top of all the worrying about
the silly prep... then worrying whether you're going to wake up and be lucid during the procedure... then worrying you won't wake up at all... then worrying about
complications... I'm terrified about
what they might find. I know that sounds crazy since overall I'm feeling better than I was over the summer.
But unfortunately this last two weeks I've got a UTI, which has become apparent is likely from a fistula to my bladder. How do I know? TMI moment
......... I've got air coming out male places that it shouldn't......... and the infection is very slow to respond. So to me it's like "if I've got a fistula now, what else is going on"?
So...? Oh yeah, I said I needed a pep talk. Do you worry about
all this stuff when it's your time for a colonoscopy? I feel like such a whiner, or that I should be toughing it out because it's not really that bad. And the truth is, overall it's not that terrible to go through. They shoot you up, you go to sleep, you wake up and you fart. And then it's over. And the slightly ironic (kind of) thing is my abdominal pain which has been present and horrible for well over four months has been subsiding since I've been on these antibiotics (Bactrim and Flagyl) for the UTI/suspected fistula. It's all this worry and anxiety that's making me nuts. I try to comfort myself with the fact that what I"m going through isn't that bad comparatively to what many others face. But I get tired of doing that. Then I feel really rotten.
Finally, I haven't decided whether I'm going to flavor my drink. I drank it plain last time (it's the stuff that's like a gallon of heavy salt water) because I don't do artificial sweetener, but they told me I could use a sugared powder drink like Kool-aid to flavor it. Has anyone done this? Does it make it any better? Sometimes I think I'd rather just drink crap than drink lime flavored crap. Anyway, sorry for ranting. Thanks loads for anything you can say that might make me feel better.
Post Edited (DaytoDay) : 12/14/2009 7:05:25 AM (GMT-7)