My heart goes out to you ((hugs)) You appear to have a very balanced perspective on the situation. You have been through so much and to have this happen seems to be a right kick in the face.
If you disregard the Crohns for a minute-Pregnancy, child birth and adapting to a new baby in the family can be extremely difficult(as much as the baby was wanted/loved) The whole role of two people suddenly change, they are parents and are responsible for this new little person(partners are often 'forgot' about as their whole time is consumed with this new baby.I think that there are very few couples who can adapt without any problems along the way, it certainly takes time(for some more than a couple of months!) but they do get there.
Add in the Crohns..... You have obviously not been well and unable to help bring up your daughter, wife has double the stress-I totally understand how she feels/must of felt(and from how you write so do you) I do not believe that having this awful disease is the trigger factor here (although obviously it does have it's input;) )
You, your wife and child all have needs and appreciate being told you are loved, look nice etc-that is human nature but when baby comes along the only thing that matters is baby-why do we have them again lol. As for passion and love, that goes out the window until they have left home I can't help you, all I am trying to say is what you are going through is pretty normal for new parents I just wish that you could hang in there and give it another go. It will not be easy but even little things like a nice comment to each other, not talking about the baby for once or your illness, having some time out on a 'date' will all help build bridges.
A relative of mine is going through a similar situation right now-four month old baby, dad has lost job and been diagnosed with Addisons Disease(can't help with baby cause keeps passing out) mum not getting support, blames dad who has enough problems of his own, dad then has complete nervous breakdown, they separate.
Perhaps you both having your own space for a while will improve relations (it can happen)
I hope everything turns out for the best, for all for you
Post Edited (vixen) : 5/1/2010 3:17:27 AM (GMT-6)