I sympathise, but not a lot I can say to offer help, really :-/ I've been there, and I'm still there, but it doesn't make your disease go away. That is, I've had Crohn's for 10 years and have never been in remission, and this year I plumbed the depths of frustration and despair. Not because my symptoms are that terrible (tbh they don't seem that bad compared to a lot of people's, despite supposedly having really bad Crohn's), but because of the chronic, grinding relentlessness of them. When my doctor closed off one avenue of treatment after another, I raged for weeks, if not months, about it. Mainly silently, but with the occasional spillover elsewhere.
And now things aren't exactly hunky dory, but I do feel calmer about the future ahead with Crohn's. If you can't make the disease go into remission, then I think you need to start thinking about symptom management. For example, Questran or Loperamide for diarrhoea, altering your diet so you feel less pain, etc. You can also consider alternative treatments, eg radical change of diet, LDN, hookworm therapy (if you're rich), etc. If the pain is daily and very bad, you should be on painkillers, but I know doctors are funny about them - others here can doubtless give better advice on that front than I can.
Good luck... :-/