Cindy, if you work with your docs, I suspect that you can find some help on all of these issues. A mild sedative would go a long way to helping with your fear of flying. Perhaps you might even relax and take a short nap. If the flight is long enough you might even be able to take an Ambien and sleep four hours. I've certainly done that to avoid jetlag.
I've had gut trouble my whole life and it's been pretty bad, on and off, since my teens. In over 30 years the only time I've ever been at a loss to find something I can eat was at a Mexican restaurant, because I just can't tolerate pepper. I've been in business meetings where a meal was served and most often I can eat whatever was served. Certainly there were times I ate things I shouldn't have, but that was by choice. I could have skipped those items. I've never once had anyone pay any attention to what I picked out or ate around. Everyone everywhere has likes, dislikes and things they just can't eat.
Can you Use imodium to stop or slow down the D? I am lucky enough that it always works for me. Sure I might have to pop an extra dose, but if I have imodium, I can usually avoid the "stuck in the bathroom" scenario. A few times when I knew I was flaring up and had meetings all day I just took the immodium proactively and it always got me through.
YOU ARE A STRONG, POWERFUL, SMART WOMAN WHO OTHERS WANT TO HAVE AROUND. Use that power to build up your confidence and self esteem and talk with your docs about ways to avoid the pitfalls you are so worried about. Options are out there that can get most of us through the average day. Sure, a flare might happen, but you can't worry yourself into one - just go ahead and live your life. Plan for the possibilities and don't waste too much time on the what ifs. You decide what's best for you and then go for it, or not. Carpe Diem!
Keah, who still does not have Crohn's!!!