Wow chiba, you really know your herbal stuff ! Spot on. I thought it was only me knew about
these sorts of arcane facts. But you know, you are supposed to use a period or colon etc wherever you would draw breath saying it !

(Don't tell me - you are short on colons, you had a resection ?

)
My humble input is this RxCrohnie: I have a theory about
the grilled cheese sandwich.

I am dairy free, but once upon a time I fell off the cheese wagon...and no ill effects resulted.
I knew that I'd had problems with cheeses before, so why not now ? I researched the ingredients: the key it seems is annatto. This is a tropical berry used as colouring in cheeses; in the UK it is always mentioned under allergy information because it is associated with headaches in some people. But actually it is also known to have anti-inflammatory properties, and it is actually used as a herbal medicine in the tropics. Turns out, any cheese without annatto makes me ill PDQ, if it has annatto I have to eat a
lot to suffer any.
This theory gets blown out of the water if you are eating gruyere, (non-cow's milk is a different game) but hey, worth mentioning ?
Rxchronie, the desperation you are feeling is common to all of us when we experience a flare. The first thing that happens is your body's ability to make neurotransmitters is compromised - 50% of the total amount are used in the gut - and so depression results very quickly. It's not you not coping, it's the way the illness makes you feel.
We've all been where you are, it's a grim place but just by the law of averages things will improve in the end, and now you have our experiences and mistakes to help you. Remember you are not alone, and this too will pass...