I'm new to this whole thing, for a long time I wanted to cope, shut in my feelings and not talk to anyone about
how i feel.. I actually would get very annoyed when people asked me too many questions if I wasn't in the mood to talk.. But, I was diagnosed in sept '03 and about
every six months I have a flare of some sort. Recently for about
2 months I have the classic symptoms of a flair, the gas, bloating, pain, weightloss, and constant bathroom visits.. and to add to that every morning I throw up nothing but stomach acid because it has all come out the other end..I dont know what is causing it and the acid reflux medicine doesn't work so it can't be heart burn, or ulcers.
So I have an appointment with my doctor again..I've been on entocort for 2 weeks and things aren't getting better for me, the entocort has stopped the nausea, and pain, but im still having the diarhea, . No matter what diet I do or what I try and do to stay healthy it seems when I'm finally feeling back to my normal and ok.. Boom and on comes the cramping, diarrhea and 30 runs to the bathroom throughout the day..
My mom has insisted on going with me to the doctor tomorrow because she just doesn't feel I'm asking any questions... She right.. Every time I go in and its the lets start prednisone or go back on entocort I just shut down.. I don't want to talk to my doctor, I just want to be left alone to cry and get over it, suck it up and take the medicine.. but this time it hasn't stoped the diarhea and now shes mad at me...
So when I try and explain to her how im feeling.. all she can relate to is my emotions of frustration of not getting it fixed and the embarrasement of having to constantly worry what the people at work are thinking when I say " I need to run to the bathroom, I'll be right back".. She doesn't understand my pain and that my girgling in my stomach IS NOT LIKE HERS!!!.. Mine is like a small child running through my intestines kicking me along the way.. It doesn't always hurt but I know when he runs low enough I better be near a restroom.. How do I get her to understand this!?!?!?! My mom has become a strong believer that everything is in your head.. If you are feeling bad just think positively and you will be all better.. This doesn't make it go away.. just puts is off for a later time when its gonna really kick me..
Im Just frustrated that I cant get it under control and that I might have to go to the next step of medicine, I fear all the side effects.. the steroids and asacol have already caused my hips to pop and my joints to hurt.. I at one time was even loosing some hair.. i just don't want to have anymore problems and just wish it would stay undercontrol...