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Regular Member

Date Joined Apr 2006
Total Posts : 192
   Posted 12/7/2007 8:19 AM (GMT -7)   
Hello All,
I only post on here a bit, but find it very comforting and helpful.  I just need to vent to people who understand what I am going through.  I am so tired of having to explain this disease all the time.  No one understands why I can't eat that, or too much, ahhhh.  Sometimes I just feel so alone.  No one know the pain and what it feels like, the anxiety that comes with it.  I am just so down lately. Probably because I just kind of starting dating someone and trying to explain things just seems pointless.  I wish more people understood.  So I come here, to thank you all for being out there, and understanding.  I don't know what I would do without this place.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Apr 2006
Total Posts : 1665
   Posted 12/7/2007 8:43 AM (GMT -7)   
I so understand. one thing I try to do is explain without worrying about people understanding or believing me. that might sound strange, but I deal often with friends who, I suspect, just think it is stress, or diet, or whatever. I am committed to not trying to make them believe me or 'get it' it takes too darn much work.
as for dating, I would try to explain things as accurately and briefly as possible, and then go on to more interesting topics and flirting :)
48 y/o woman.  Diagnosed 4/06 after colonscopy, SBFT, CT-scan all showed crohns. 3 months later, after pred and remicade, all tests showed no crohns. In December had adhesions cut through a laparoscopy. Now just taking Glycolax, metamucil and vicidin as needed.

Regular Member

Date Joined Apr 2006
Total Posts : 192
   Posted 12/7/2007 8:55 AM (GMT -7)   

Thanks yogaprof. I really appreciate that.  I will try that, to explain without worrying.  I know thats a big problem of mine. 

Yes, brief is very good! he he.


Thank you!

Regular Member

Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 277
   Posted 12/11/2007 3:22 AM (GMT -7)   
I agree with yoga prof. The more you worry to try to make them understand, the crazier you will feel and it's so much nicer spending that EXTRA energy to something that is meaningful to you that makes you happy.
Newbie - 35 yrs old Diagnosed: 08/03/07
Asacol 3x day
Imuran 50MG 3 x day
Lamictal 125 MG/day for bioloar II

Veteran Member

Date Joined Oct 2004
Total Posts : 3042
   Posted 12/11/2007 3:33 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi, I totally agree with yogaprof. I enjoy come here and helping ppl with Crohn's. We are the only one's whom understand each other and what we go through.

Hi, I am teddybearweiser, I am a male.
I was diagnosed with crohns disease when i was admitted to the hospital
in 1992, in Jan of 1993 I was back in the hospital for surgery for my crohns. I had part of my right colon resectioned with ilecolonstomy.
 My GI doctor has me on Asacol, Dicyclomine,Imuran,Celebrex and Remicade. B-12 injection once a month.
My Internest doctor has me on Lisnopril-HTCZ and Folic Acid. Diagnosed
with Osteoarthritis July 2007

Regular Member

Date Joined Nov 2007
Total Posts : 83
   Posted 12/11/2007 7:14 AM (GMT -7)   
i think it helps since im so tiny that people automatically assume that i dont eat much - but i really do, just instead i eat many small meals. im usually eating every 2 - 3 hours. that's an excuse you can use! people tend to understand that better - and i don't have to go into detail as to why i cant eat certain things, or why i only eat a certain portion at a time. i also carry a ton of snacks with me everywhere i go. just in case i can't eat anything thats offered, i have a back up thats tummy friendly. - im known for my awesome snacks :D

my poor boyfriend is doing the best he can to understand and help me during this time. even just last night he asked me why sometimes i feel fine and sometimes i dont - i usually make things up just to appease him. i guess that could be bad, but its so much easier that way. i'll say i didnt sleep well enough, or i think i ate something that hates me. he understands my system is sensitive and tries to help the best he can. i try to keep it simple.

its harder in a early relationship to understand, and express to them what's wrong - but i think it would help to use simple terms, like youre describing something to a child. only because typically you speak in the simplest manner and it's to the point. my boyfriend is usually good with, "im not feeling well" i find that men are pretty good with the least amt of detail possible. :P and maybe make it silly... helps me to feel a little better and distract myself. after i was diagnosed i explained to my boyfriend what crohn's is, i told him - my body is attacking my insides and we have to stop it from thinking my insides are bad. it's painful and gross but i remain hopeful - something to that extent :P he also did a lot of research and sent me web sites for more information, which meant so much to me! you'll see that once the relationship gets deeper it'll be easier to share more.

youll find the right guy for you, and he'll understand to the best that he's able. :)

24 yrs - female : diagnosed with Crohn's 11/29/07 : 50mg 6mp

"i believe - you can keep going long after you can't"

Veteran Member

Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 1202
   Posted 12/11/2007 7:56 AM (GMT -7)   
I too am single and starting to think about dating. Been there before and heavly is right. I've only had one guy walk away and he admitted to being a "fair-weather dater." (his words.) Who needs that? It's hard to explain in the beginning, but I say similar to heavly's advice -- that my body is attacking my guts and it leads to pain, stuff not appropriate to mention over a table, fever and exhaustion when it's at its worst. But, I've found that if I am positive and optimistic, they don't mind the Crohn's. (not that I've had this conversation all that many times, but I have been dx for nearly 5 years and single the whole time, except one year long relationship!) The best is when I guy researches it on their own. It's my opinion that the "good" ones do because they care about understanding. And! You *are* more than your guts! I remind myself that all of the time. Even more, your Crohn's experience has shaped me into who I am now. I have changed a lot since being diagnosed. I appreciate the changes in my life, now, having learned whatever lessons it's taught me, I'm ready for it to go away! ;-)

Regular Member

Date Joined Apr 2006
Total Posts : 192
   Posted 12/11/2007 10:20 AM (GMT -7)   
Thank you everyone.  I appreciate your posts and advise.  It is just so nice.
Thank you all.

Regular Member

Date Joined Jun 2006
Total Posts : 267
   Posted 12/11/2007 2:17 PM (GMT -7)   
I can totally relate to what you're feeling. It seems like no one understands! They especially don't seem to understand how sometimes you can seem fine and then an hour later you are sick as a dog, it comes and goes that quickly, do people think that when you have CD you should be sick all the time? The way this disease has changed my quality of life is amazing to me, I never would have believed it if I wasn't living with it every day. I am single, having gotten out of a 2 year relationship 4 months ago, I am terrified to get out there and start dating again. I just don't want the hassle of explaining why I dont' eat very much, why I run to the bathroom a lot, why I don't feel well so often...this disease and the possible effects of it are soooo don't want to know about fistulas, fissures, anal tags...etc. Who can blame them?
Marci, 38 years old, Rockledge, FL
Dx with Crohn's disease March 2006, currently on bi-weekly Humira, daily 6mg Entocort, daily 2-3x 5mg hydrocodone (for pain), and daily 75mg Effexor, plus 3x per day heavy iron supplements for anemia

Veteran Member

Date Joined Mar 2005
Total Posts : 4305
   Posted 12/11/2007 7:56 PM (GMT -7)   
I know where you are coming from and it does get real old when I have to try and explain it to them only to have then even more cofused and look at you like you are crazy as you know what.

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