I see a psychiatrist and a psycologist. My psychiatrist usually only prescribes meds. We talk very little. My psycologist is the one I talk to. I get a lot out of the sessions. She is very good. And very understanding. I think that you need somebody to talk to along with seeing your psychiatrist. (those are such long words to type).
I think there is a reason you drink and isolate yourself. I use to drink alone too. I didn't need an occasion to drink, I just did it everyday, it became a part of my life. After a while I quit. I realized that all I was doing was stifiling my feelings with alcohol. That is what we tend to do when life becomes over whelming to us.
You might need something for ADD too. If your mind is wandering while you are trying to work. You should mention that to your psych. I could never concentrate, even as a child. But I had trauma going on at home and I was always worried what I would be coming home to after school.
Please seek help for this. I know you think that the wine is making you feel better, but it is adding to your depression hon. You don't notice that until you stop for a while, you will feel better I promise. Though it takes a little time for the good feelings to come back. They will.
In the meantime, keep posting and let us know how you are doing. We are here for you, we want you to feel better. You deserve it.
Luv and hugs,
fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue, clinically depressed and allergies