this is Kitt and you are not a loser so throw that word out :)
I am going to suggest you may want to work on building your self esteem and not beat yourself up. Go slowly here, you will come out a winner.
Take little steps and make small choices to gain confidence in your ability to make a decision. Make the choice to not run yourself down. You are a good person and you will meet someone when you least expect to.
Reward yourself when you succeed. You deserve to have your dreams, and to make them come true. Believe in yourself completely, and others will also believe and trust you. Give yourself a hug, buy yourself some flowers but feel good about you. Post your success here and we will be excited to cheer you on. :)
Don't always try to please others. It is considerate to care about others' feelings but your needs are important also. Do not try to be like someone else either. You will be at your best when you are being yourself because of your uniqueness. Strive to be your best, but do not criticise yourself if you fall short of your expectations. You are human after all, just like us. Work on some of these and you will be surprised how much better you feel.
You can do this and you will find happiness. Just believe.