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Just A Very Random Blitz of Depression..

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Depression
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BeautifulDisaster14
New Member
Joined : Feb 2008
Posts : 13
Posted 2/24/2008 7:12 PM (GMT -7)
Hey Everyone

Im new on healingwell but im Howlyncats daughter. Anyways, the reason for this thread was because, id been reading through everyone else stories, and thought id open up to my own.  On January 15th, 2003 my dad passed away. And lately i find that everything is just reminding me of him, like i'll hear his favourite song Kissed By a Rose, or ill watch a movie with a wedding and ill think my dad wont be there for mine, and I have an amazing step father, who in reality is a better father to me then mine ever was, bu that doesnt stop the pain or the hurt. And im also slowly watching my grandfather pass away, and i was always very close to him, my nan passed away last year and i loved her to pieces but my grandfather was the one i was always closest to. Just lately its hard to find fun in anything, Jesse, my boyfriend, tries his hardest to keep me smiling, and my friends and family do too. Friday night with my mom and Saturday with my friends was the most fun i had in a while. the things i used to love just arent things that are easy to stay interested in. I know that i will ahve to live many many more years without my father and many others in my life, and i do try to celebrate the life they had yet im still so mad at him, but i miss him. Idk im kinda confused and messed up right now, lol, im sorry for venting but thanks for listening,
take care

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getting by
Forum Moderator
Joined : Sep 2007
Posts : 44908
Posted 2/24/2008 7:29 PM (GMT -7)

Hi Beautifuldisaster,

You have come to a good place.  Everybody is understanding here and very kind.  I am so sorry for your losses.  The sad thing is the feeling of loss.  But I feel that these people watch over us forever.  And they are in our hearts and all of the good memories that we have about them.  I guess that I feel death is a part of life and they aren't leaving us but going somewhere else.  I don't know what your beliefs are so I am kind of stepping out on a limb.  Maybe you need to let it out and have a good cleansing cry.  That often helps me.  You know if you play his song, that it will happen so if you think that you need that release go for it.

Other than that all I can say is to share your feelings, either through counseling, or through here.  You can talk all you need and there will always be somebody listening.

I wish you well, keep posting.

hugs,

Karen

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stkitt
Elite Member
Joined : Apr 2007
Posts : 32602
Posted 2/24/2008 10:47 PM (GMT 0)
Dear Cait,

Please give yourself permission to feel sad and let the tears out when you need too.  You have normal feelings inside and anger is one of them.  After all why do bad things happen to good people?

Remember these people you loved did not choose to leave you,  so feel angry and then let it go.  Feel sad and let the tears flow.  Then do your best to move on as they would all want you to be happy.

This is your time to live and be happy.  Hold your loved ones close to you in your heart and they will be with you through all the good times and the not so good times you go through in this life. May your God bless you and watch over you.

My wish for you is peace and happiness but most of all I wish you love.
Hugs
Kitt

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