Thanks you guys, I know that I should let go, he doesnt come and see me, wont return my calls I know why that is but I just dont understand how he can stay away from me, if the roles were reversed, I would try my best to get some sort of understanding of us.....dont get me wrong this man has been patient, he has tolerated alot. You know I was thinking how even the most innocent thing is questioned because of the trust. I want to so much to show him how I am, my counselor has even said so.
Being without him makes me more depressed than anything. I cant even listen to my cds or the radio because of the memories.
There is a cd out by PINK. I guess her song, "who knew" was actually written about her best friend that took her life. In fact most of the cd is based around depression. Seems glum I know but sometimes these cds set the stage for a good hard cry!!!
There are a couple songs that really hit home for me and may for you too.
And for me track 10-runaway, this song gives me goosebumps because it hits home for me, the words in the first couple verses are like they are written about me. TO THE T
Anyway it is snowing cats and dogs. I am getting ready to go out and shovel my drive way.
if you get a chance to listen to that cd, I would. Be prepared to cry though. I only encourage it because I have to make myself physically grieve, takes away from the mental grieve for a little bit.