First of all welcome to the depression forum, we will help you in any way we can.
Secondly, I have to ask you from now on please don't post in all capitals, it is hard to read and people think that you are shouting. So if you can, use the regular printing. Thank you.
Thirdly, your husband shouldn't be talking to somebody else and shouldn't be telling you that it is none of your business. I am sure he wouldn't like it if you did that to him. Try not to dwell on it though, that will only make you more depressed.
There are programs for people with no insurance, I would suggest you contact Social Services and find out if you qualify for any help. You should be able to get help with doctors visits and with your medications.
For now try some deep breathing to relax, no matter what is going on around you, you have to try to relax. You can't control a lot of the circumstances but you can control how you react. So first of all try to get some help with meds and dr appts. Then get some counseling to help you deal with the rest. I do think that your husband is wrong for keeping secrets, but that should be the least of your worries right now because you have to take care of you. So try to put that out of your mind and do some things to make yourself feel better. You are a special person and you deserve to feel good. Maybe we can find some resources for you to find some help with the meds and the appts. Also some doctors can give out samples of the meds that could get you through until you can get some other help. I would talk to them about it.
I hope that this helps some, keep posting, we are here for you.
Luv and hugs, Karen
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies