Wow. I havent told anyone yet, but I am dealing with the same thing. I havent been eating much lately. I eat some things that I know are good for me, I eat them in a small portion, but then I might eat a lot just because I am hungry, but I know I can just throw it up so it seems as if that is the way out. However, I know this isnt good. I have just been really obsessed with everything I eat. I see food and I am tempted, but I dont want to eat it. My mom stopped by McDonalds and I was with her, she wanted to eat in and my first thought was "oh gosh, I dont want to eat in because then I will have to eat." I am actually amazed that I am doing this, but I cant help it. It has just over-taken me. I was afraid to say anything because I have had alot of experience with things turning out to be a big problem for me, and I dont want this to grow into something else. I just dont want it to become a "habit", so to speak. I am not really sure what I should do. Normally I would wait and see what happens, but I have never really had good results from that.. but, what am I supposed to do since it hasnt become a "problem" yet.
I just dont really understand why I am having these feelings. I understand that I dont like my weight but I cant figure out why I would want to go to any extreme to make myself feel better. I really dont understand it, but I know it could potentially become a huge problem.
"Healing is an energy phenomenon. Hope is another
word for Healing.
"Cracks in the concrete are just reminders that you fall apart
no matter how strong you are"
"Sometimes it is best to forget what you feel and remember what you deserve"
"Im going to
smile like nothing is wrong, talk like everything is perfect, act like its all a dream, and pretend its not hurting me."