These two are so right on.
Your parents want to control you. And I think their actions are showing an insecurity on their part because they are losing their grip on you. I am glad that you are paying your own way through school. I didn't realize that, I thought that they were paying. That gives you that much more power. You can get past this. The thing that is sad is that once you finish school, and you will, you may choose to stay away from them and that is going to be a huge loss for them. They are basically pushing you away. You have come a long way in the last few months, don't let them take that away from you.
Froggy said "you are you and nobody can change who you are except you". That makes so much sense. You just have to believe that. You are an individual. You are growing in that way. So don't let them change who you are, and you and only you can let that happen.
They are very harsh in what they say. You are not stupid and you are not a failure. You are an intellegent young lady and have a wonderful future ahead of you. So I would say take these guys advice and run with it. You will make it, you are stronger than you think.
Your parents do love you. They just have a stupid way of showing it. They feel that they have to tell you everything to do. They don't want to let you grow up. But you are already there.
Take care, keep posting. We are all here for you.
Luv and hugs, Karen