Posted 4/26/2008 6:33 AM (GMT -6)
Yana

My son is bipolar,and he would also go into tantrums and then an hour later he was fine.

I hope he realizes how lucky he is to have you,not alot of women would put up with that, you love him and understand.

Has he gotten on meds yet?
Shy


Mod- Depression

Chronic Depression, Panic Attacks,Anxiety Attacks,Anorexia

Please remember,I am not a professional..I am just a person who is also fighting depression.

Posted 4/26/2008 9:15 AM (GMT -6)
MEDS ?grrrrr he won't even tell me about his MI ,so you know.The more understanding and loving i am for him the more he uses it to his advantage.Seems like never ending cycle.
I din't go alone but spent time alone at home and not together,if i went alone he fights more when i return as he tends to feel neglected and jealous,this has happened few times earlier so i m unsure how to deal with this.

I am feeling more depressed this morning by all this.Its affecting my health.Thx for listening and support.
Never work just for money or for power. They won't save your soul or help you sleep at night.
~Marian Wright Edelman~


I have discovered that all human evil comes from this, man's being unable to sit still in a room.
~Blaise Pascal~

Posted 4/26/2008 9:32 AM (GMT -6)
 Hi Yana,
 
It doesn't sound like the most healthy relationship right now.  Especially if he gets jealous when you go out.  I was wondering if that was the reason that you didn't want to go alone.  With his unhealthy moods, it sounds like it is really rough for you.  Maybe you need to sit down and talk about it with him.  Can you do that, or does he become defensive?
 
What is an MI?  Sorry I don't know. 
 
It sounds like he is really taking advantage of your good nature.  That isn't right.  You can only live with so much and it will get you much more depressed.  So I would take the health issue into consideration and really think about the relationship.  I am sorry he wont get help.  You can't help somebody that doesn't want it.  I know you love him, but seriously think about what it is doing to you.
 
Good luck, keep me posted.
 
hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

Posted 4/26/2008 12:45 PM (GMT -6)
MI means mental illness,i can't seem to sit and have a talk with him (he gets defensive ),i feel very sad today and feel like harming myself(which i have never thought before)its scary....i need help!
Never work just for money or for power. They won't save your soul or help you sleep at night.
~Marian Wright Edelman~


I have discovered that all human evil comes from this, man's being unable to sit still in a room.
~Blaise Pascal~

Posted 4/26/2008 12:53 PM (GMT -6)

Yana,

Don't do anything to hurt yourself, you haven't done anything wrong.  Your boyfriend has a problem and you are just frustrated because he is being defensive. 

I am going to give you some numbers to call just in case, okay?

800 dontcut

708 366 9066

800 443 4673

Now if this gets to the point where you can't control your urges, call somebody or call one of these numbers.  Do you have access to a crisis center where you can talk to somebody?

I want you to see this so I am going to submit it, but I want to talk to you further.

hugs, Karen


  Moderator-Depression
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

Posted 4/26/2008 1:01 PM (GMT -6)

Yana,

I want you to know that you are a very special person.  I love the way you word things when you write, you are supportive of others, you are kind and compassionate.  You have all of the qualities of a wonderful person.  I think what is bothering you is like what use to bother me about my first husband.  There was no communication...

I would always want to talk things out and he didn't.  He would either get defensive or treat me like I was stupid.  He was also very posessive and jealous of me.  He was so bad that he made a line across our driveway so he could tell if anybody came in our yard.  He would check the star 69 on the phone as soon as he came home from work to see if anybody called me.  I got really frustrated and would hurt myself just to feel something.  Also it got me a result and I was in control.  So you don't need that.  We will help you.  But you have to take care of yourself, before you can know what to do about your bf.  Are you in any counseling?  It always helps to have an objective ear in these situations.

I want you to remember what you wrote about the forum and take your own advice.  Come to us, we are here for you right now.

Luv and hugs, Karen


  Moderator-Depression
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

Posted 4/26/2008 1:02 PM (GMT -6)
I am too chicken to try that karen,i am extremely miserable and sad.He fails to know what i am going through.i just hate him.I wish i din't love him .I feel like going far from his life where he can't find me ever which is again a bad thought.

thanks for your concern.
Never work just for money or for power. They won't save your soul or help you sleep at night.
~Marian Wright Edelman~


I have discovered that all human evil comes from this, man's being unable to sit still in a room.
~Blaise Pascal~

Posted 4/26/2008 1:08 PM (GMT -6)
Yana,

Do you feel like he abuses you mentally in any way? Is it the lack of communication that is bothering you? You seem awful upset about it and I haven't got a clue, other than that of him not wanting to go to the party. What else is there? Do you want to talk about it? I really feel like there is more to this than you are saying.

I am here to listen...

hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

Posted 4/26/2008 4:34 PM (GMT -6)

It sounds like the communication problem is starting to get out of hand. Have you thought about sitting down with him and telling him that you know? It sounds like something is going to have to give soon. Have you also thought about discussing the consequences it has on you?


Everyone has a guardian angel. They help pick you up when you fall, comfort you through your times of need and help you appreciate the times when things are going well.
 
"A gold medal is a wonderful thing. But if your not enough without it, you will never be enough with it." - Irvine Blitzer (John Candy) in Cool Runnings
 
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Posted 4/27/2008 7:09 AM (GMT -6)
Yana

I just want to tell you that in order to get better you have to change your environment.
Currently your situation is not a healthy one, it almost sounds like it could be a mental abuse situation,and that is not going to help you get better.

At some point,if he is not willing to get help,then you need to really think hard on the situation.

You deserve to be happy,and you can't help someone if they are not willing to help themselves.
Shy


Mod- Depression

Chronic Depression, Panic Attacks,Anxiety Attacks,Anorexia

Please remember,I am not a professional..I am just a person who is also fighting depression.

Posted 4/27/2008 2:50 PM (GMT -6)

Hi Yana,

Just checking in on you.  Let us know how you are doing.

Hugs, Karen


  Moderator-Depression
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

Posted 4/28/2008 2:09 PM (GMT -6)
Hi Karen,
Thx a bunch for your concern and support.I am still feeling under the storm ,i am taking things slow.

Thx everyone for your thoughtfulness ,i am so grateful for your support and love for me here.

i would keep you all posted.

love ya
yana
Never work just for money or for power. They won't save your soul or help you sleep at night.
~Marian Wright Edelman~


I have discovered that all human evil comes from this, man's being unable to sit still in a room.
~Blaise Pascal~

Posted 4/29/2008 6:37 AM (GMT -6)
You are very welcome Yana

We are very concerned for you,so please keep us posted on how you are doing.
Shy


Mod- Depression

Chronic Depression, Panic Attacks,Anxiety Attacks,Anorexia

Please remember,I am not a professional..I am just a person who is also fighting depression.

Posted 4/30/2008 12:40 PM (GMT -6)
I feel like going crazy ,its overwhelming !!i would drop by here many times for support.

hugs
yana
Never work just for money or for power. They won't save your soul or help you sleep at night.
~Marian Wright Edelman~


I have discovered that all human evil comes from this, man's being unable to sit still in a room.
~Blaise Pascal~

Posted 4/30/2008 1:57 PM (GMT -6)

Please remember Yana,

We are always here for you.  So don't hesitate to post when you feel the need.  We will support you in any way that  we can.

I am so sorry for what you are going through right now.  If you want to elaborate, feel free.  I will be around for a while.  I might step out, but I will check back.

Hugs, Karen


  Moderator-Depression
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

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