And welcome to Healing Well,
If you want to be more independant you have to think for yourself. You can't worry what other people think about
you. You are just as important as the next person so what you think is what counts. We actually grow independant. We learn to take care of ourselves. You might want to get a job to become financially independant. You think for yourself to be mentally independant. You decide that you don't need other peoples opinions to become emotionally independant.
It sounds like that you don't want to need other people, but we all do. It is only human. I know that you are sad about
your friend, you will make new ones. You might not want to be as volnerable as you maybe were, but don't let one bad experience cause you not to be friends with others. And don't blame yourself for what your friend may have done to you. That is a part of life, we all go through that at one time or another. And if we are lucky, we don't become cynical.
It sounds like you should talk to your doctor and get on another antidepressant. It sometimes takes a little while to find the one that is right for you. It is like trial and error. It took me a few years to fine what works for me. Some people are luckier though and find something faster.
I think that you have some things that you want and need to work on and we are here to help you. Don't think that your husband is going to leave you, especially when he says that he is not. Fears like that only make you more anxious and makes your depression worse.
So keep posting and we will be here for you.
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies