it has been awhile since I have even been on my computer. In fact I think that last day I posted on HW was the last time I was on this.
Anyway, going through the change in meds and having somewhat of a difficult time. I was advised by my counselor to take some of the meds I was taken off because she didnt understand why my doctor would go cold turkey with me w/o hopitalization. She seemed concerned and I told her that I was not surprised because once again I have fallen into the cracks of noncaring professionals. I told her that I thought about going back to the psych doc I had at the hospital because he seemed more "humane". I am just so confused.
This past weekend was as usual, sad and lonely. I had my son with me so it was a good weekend because of him. I have kept myself busy with laying flooring in my kitchen and bath. It looks so pretty, I have done so many things around the house that I am starting to think that I will never get out of this hermit mode. I really have thought about things in my life lately and I am not sure where to go. I feel alone with noone to guide me through this car thing and other difficult things.
My stepfather had a heart attack last week but he is ok so far. My daughter is doing good with her pregnancy, so just glows. I guess with nothing to really look forward to in my life, I look forward to my little grandbaby.
I am going Friday to have my implant turned off and possibly schedule a date to have it removed. Another thing that is really scary that I will take on alone. I am really worried about how I am going to do with all this change in my life. I have to say I am actually scared to be by myself, for the first time in a long time, I am really feeling as if I am the only person on this earth except for all the bad s--t that is happening in my world.
I pray everyday for my faith to be just a little stronger at least for one more day.
Im ok though you guys, it made me happy to see that you guys were missing me.