Posted 5/16/2008 11:39 AM (GMT -6)
I have only been here a few times and since my last post I have been to the doctor and am now on Wellbutrin, I am a month in and just this week was bumped up from 150s to 300s. The 150s were just not getting the job done.
My sons birthday was the 6th and we had his party on the Saturday before, my family came, my parents, my brother, my sister and her husband and baby. They spent the weekend here. When they come it is very stressful for me. There are so many little things that they do that annoy me and some rather big things that make me want to pull my hair out. It has only been two weeks and I am not yet over that weekend, my parents are coming for another visit next weekend, they will be here from Thursday evening to Sunday. I know that I can not handle this, but I can not tell them not to come, they don't live close and they want to spend time with the grandchildren. So I would feel guilty for saying No you can't come. My husband said I should just tell them I'm not feeling good and that would be true I am not feeling good, but they are my parents and I can't do that. How do I cope with the constant noise, constant complaining, giving my children things I don't want them to have, telling me how I need to be living, talking about things that I don't want to talk about and making little of those things I do talk about, ignoring me totally or cutting me off in the middle of a sentence and never letting me pick back up again. Critizing what I watch, what I read, and what I wear. Why is it that it has to be an emotional battle for me each and every time they come? I am just wondering, should I lay down some ground rules before they come, let them know what bothers me and ask them not to do it, I have a whole list, it boggles the mind some of it.
My medicine has not kicked in totally yet and this has been a really really bad week, right now I see no light at the end, I see no light at all and all I want to do is go to sleep. How am I suppose to deal with them all over again so soon?
The center of the problem never knows it's the problem, all it knows is it has a problem with all the problems that have a problem with it, what it doesn't realize is if it wasn't a problem all the other problems wouldn't be a problem.