So i am back on Elavil now. My doctor took me off Celexa because i was not able to sleep. Now i think the transition of shifting to a new medication is taking it's toll. All i want to do is sleep. I knew it was going to take some time for the medication to take effect but i wish it would sooner rather than later. I feel so hopeless and lazy.On top of it all my allergies are acting up. This medication worked before. It let me sleep. That is what i want instead of taking sleeping pills to sleep. If i dont take a sleeping pill i only get 4-5 hours of sleep. Im irritable,agitated,have no patience and restless. Now im on Elavil and no longer on the Celexa and I am so tired and wore out. There is no reason for it either. So this is what I hate about
myself...feeling this way. This makes me feel different from anyone and i just want to be normal and on no medication. Two years i will be on this medication. I gained 12 pounds on it. I lost 6 pounds of it. Im afraid to gain more. My appetite increased and so im trying to just eat fruit. With the celexa i was constantly going to the batheroom,no sleep,and no libido. With the elavil i gain weight,increase of appetite,sensitive to the sun, and craving for sweets. I hated gaining the weight. Granted my husband liked it because my chest got bigger. But it made me depressed more to go up a size. But now all i want is to sleep on my own. I forget what that is like without sleeping pills. I love when i sleep because my dreams are so vivid and it makes me feel like i escape the reality of my life. Sometimes my dreams feel so real. My life is not bad. I dont need to escape from it. I just dont enjoy my life at this moment because how i feel. There really is no logic reason why i shouldnt not be enjoying my life. Im not going to get depressed about
gaining weight. I will work out harder and learn to love my curves. I need to get better not just for me but my family. I feel i hold them back because i dont want to do anything and i get irritated with them. This makes me so sad. I dont want my family to suffer. I have to push myself to do things. I know eventually i will feel better once the elavil sinks in but i wish i would now. i dont like feeling like this.