I am married to a man who has depression, has been diagnosed twice in three years, takes meds, but still lives in denial that he has depression or that it impacts the way he behaves or that it has an impact on me.
My advice is to stand firm that you can not be with this person unless he will take care of his depression.
I am mad at the universe, in a general way, that my husband has depression. It's not fair, and I feel great compassion that he has to suffer in this way. However, I am mad at my husband that he does not take the appropriate steps to cure his disease.
I have been married for 9 years, and I have a 5 year old. I am considering leaving, and have given my husband a timeline as to when I will leave if he does not get his act together.
It is not easy being married to a depressed person, and it IS important to feel compassion for those who are suffering from disease. But please be sure that he does not drag you down with him. In my humble, unprofessional opinion, without commitment to change, your husband could be dangerous for YOUR mental health. I too mother my husband, and it makes us both bitter and angry. Do not allow yourself to fall into that trap; stop it now, before it continues.
I wish you all the best - good luck to you.