The most horrible thing with depression is that no matter how good you feel, it still lingers unknown to us as all the things we notice when we are ok. I have never had a day in my whole life where if I felt ok I was not haunted by the thought that a terrible awful feeling of depression is waiting for me as soon as 1 little thing happens. To some people, these are minor things that they dont feel upset over but for us with depression, it can turn the best day into the worst days in a flash.
I like when I have a good day but I constantly wonder if in the next hour I could lose this good feeling again. It is so frustrating.
I just keep pushing and pushing. I have been a member here for a couple years and if you have read my posts, these show how vicious depression can be every day year after year. That is why I come here.