College has been rough..

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New Member

Date Joined Sep 2008
Total Posts : 1
   Posted 9/12/2008 1:43 AM (GMT -6)   
Alright, I just came across this site and need somewhere to vent and hopefully get some advice..

I just started college and am about a month in.. My roommate situation isn't working out too well.. We met each other at orientation and decided to room together.. Ever since we moved in, things are going down hill. We don't talk, he's gone through my things and talks about me when he thinks I'm not there (obviously I am, cause i know) and it has just been a really terrible situation.. I can't switch out of my room until at least semester, and even then it will be tough, because we requested each other.. It's just been a nightmare and I don't know what to do.

I have made massive attempts to go out and meet new people.. So I am proud of myself for that.. And i'll admit, It's been great. Don't get me wrong, I am loving college for the most part, but at times it feels like I can't take it and I'm all alone..

I've recently been hanging around a new group of guys and I absolutely love them. They are completely like me and even make me feel welcome and wanted.. For teenage guys, at least in my opinion, is very uncommon. They all live on the same floor and know about my situation and are very cool and understanding about it, and they always offer their rooms as a hangout. I am so deeply grateful for that..

At the same time though, I feel totally out of place and like a complete burden.. Were only a month in and I already have this huge issue.. A couple of the guys I have really hit it off with and I just want to tell them how I feel and how grateful I am.. But in the back of my head, I am so scared I'll be rejected by them and they I will have no one.

I tend to think into things way more then they ever need to be.. I know I can go with these guys, but at the end of the day, I feel like I have no one and if I do say something to the guys; like I really actually try to talk about how I really feel, I'll be rejected.. I don't know..


Thanks for just taking the time to read this and allowing to me get it out.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jan 2006
Total Posts : 2408
   Posted 9/12/2008 5:56 AM (GMT -6)   

Do you KNOW he has been talking about you and going through your things? I only ask because you mentioned at the end of your post that you tend to over think things and sometimes that can get things blown out of proportion. If it is true then I would speak to someone at the College. I am from the UK so I dont know how US Colleges are set up, but I think it is the same as Universities in the UK. There is usually a housing officer for your building or block that you can talk to. If there problem is that bad then I dont see why they cant move you... you cant be the only one who wants to swap surely.

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Date Joined Oct 2004
Total Posts : 4083
   Posted 9/12/2008 8:53 AM (GMT -6)   
Darren had a real good idea there, its got to be wrong of him going throug your things, that may be away out of this roomate.
As for talking about your feelings with the guys, I woud let feelings out naturally, its got to be hard, this I guess is easier said then done. I might test the waters a little and they seem sorta skiddish, maybe there will be at least one you can really click with and share how you feel.
Or/and you can also come here and talk, everybody is really supportve, will listen, you can vent
just talk, we are here.......
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Regular Member

Date Joined Sep 2008
Total Posts : 129
   Posted 9/12/2008 3:40 PM (GMT -6)   
hey soccerguy -- i know exactly how you feel because I went through a similar situation my freshman year of college. I knew my assigned roommate and I weren't going to work out by day 1. It's a horrible feeling to not want to go back to your room. Just like you, I made really good friends with some people in the dorm next to mine and hung out there all the time. I think the only reason we lasted as roommates as long as we did was that she went home every weekend. By the end of the second semester though, we got in a big fight and she ended up moving back home for the last month.

I would like to tell you that things will get better, and they might as I do not know your roommate, but from experience I can tell you that it might not. I remember from the beginning, I was also trying to switch rooms, but everyone in my dorm seemed to be content with their situations. However, I wish I would have thought about requesting to switch dorms. There are many students who decide within the first few weeks that they want to dropout of school and leave their dorms. Check with residential life to see if there are any openings elsewhere on campus and go talk to the roomie living there to see if he would be a better match. If things are too hectic this semester, try to see if you can at least get another room for the spring semester.

Let us know how things go, ok?

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