Just after Christmas last year my body started to reject my medications and I started to have serious adverse effects so I had to go off them completely. I tried numerous different types and nothing worked. My doctor suggested I try St. johns wart, but that did not work either. My doctor told me to try and see how I did without any medication at all. For the first while I had withdrawl symptoms, than things seemed to level out. I still suffered from depression, but it was at a level I could control and monitor somewhat. The past 2 weeks I notice my symptoms returning and it’s not even winter. I worry that my mental health issues are getting worse. I have experienced many of these symptoms in the past, but they seem to be worse and coming more regularly. The other night I was so paranoid that certain people were out to get me that I blocked them on face book and anyone who might “help” them. I have started to become suspicious of people at work and friends talking about me. I was so worried that people in my home town were out to get me that I almost called off a trip that I had been excited for months about. My depression is starting up again. The degree depends on the day. Some days I’m fairly levelled out, other days I break down and cannot do anything but feel sorry for myself. I was always awkward in social situations; especially with woman, but recently I have started to become so bad that I can barely have a social conversation. Since the last medications I was on reacted so wrongly I worry that with this relapse I wont be able to function at work or socially. I find myself constantly thinking and fearing that I will end up alone. I know I could have been happy with my ex, but this disease ruined it for me. I don’t know what to do anymore. I would never act on these thoughts because I couldn’t bare to put my family through that and I don’t believe it giving up. I’m extremely tired of dealing with this bull crap…Does anyone have any suggestions on what has helped them with their mental illness other than medication?
I took one sentence out of your post per HW rules. Discussions of suicide or self-harm are deemed negative and therefore potentially injurious to others are also not permitted.
Post Edited By Moderator (stkitt) : 9/21/2008 4:41:41 PM (GMT-6)