Please don't-don't give up.
You've had to endure much pain in your day, but this hopefully has, or will, make you a much stronger person. I know that it's cliche, and everyone says that, but if you've gone through what you have and are still here today that you are stronger than you will ever realize.
One thing is for sure-you should NEVER feel guilty or responsible for what has happened. And for your son, once again, not your fault. All you can do is be the best mother you can.
I can't imagine what it feels like to feel like this and be pregnant. Instead of thinking negatively you should be caring for yourself. Don't leave your son and your soon to be baby out there all alone.
I don't know you, but just from reading your post I konw that you are a wonderful beautiful and strong woman who can get through this.
I will pray for you. In the meantime, I hope that you rethink some things. Please don't let your mother's attitude or actions of the past have a present affect on you. Please seek some professional help and also know that we are all here for you...whenever you're feeling low and want to post, go right ahead. I'll continue to keep checking up and pray for you.
-Daily Migraine Headaches-
"Tell them to look up. Tell them to remember the stars."