Thank you all so much. Maybe I should just focus on getting my mental health taken care of first. I plan on going to counseling on top of being put on meds. I think I really need it. I'm already planning on putting my son in daycare 2 days a week, that way it can allow me to go to appointments and counseling (I literally do not have anybody to watch him otherwise). Plus I think he needs it, he needs to be in a place that will stimulate his mind by learning, doing activities and interacting with other kids, it will also help because he will be getting away from the house. And on top of it all I can get a break.
Gettingby, it helps so much that there is someone who can understand my mind consuming me and that I talk to myself. The talking to myself is a little embarrassing to admit. I'm definately going to mention all this when I go, it seems there is hope in getting that relieved.
Somepeace, it's nice to here that we can relate, being SAHM's and our children are close in age. It's definately not easy especially being depressed.
Kitt, I'll definately check out the website. I do need to think differently because I tend to be negative a lot. It's hard for me to be positive.
enWayen, thanks for telling me I'm a great mom and person, we depressives tend to not see the good in ourselves. I actually thought about
it the other day and told myself well, at least I do get up everyday and take care of my son even though I don't want to go through another day with him. And that I don't neglect him. I need to give myself some credit and in more areas of my life.
I just also wanted to add that there are some days where I feel like I can't even relax or focus on what I SHOULD be doing because of my mind running. I also plan on getting a blood work up first before I do the mental health stuff, to check thyroid, check for anemia, diabetes stuff like that. I haven't had a regular check up like that in a long time. I should find out about the insurance by the end of this month.
I'm just so tired of living with my mind and being depressed. I feel like there is so much more that I CAN be and I just want to feel happy and find my way in this life.
Post Edited (wishdreamhope) : 11/17/2008 8:28:39 AM (GMT-7)