As some of you know i have been getting treatment for a while now for all of the above .
This past month i have seen the drs so many times .The results from the recent tests are in and they are not good ( thats doesn`t surprise me somehow )
The recents tests have confirmed a new agressive cancer .They tell me i need more plastic surgery but am so worried as i`m not happy with the results from the first lot .
I`m suppose to see my oncologist next week as i just could not go back there this week .I only got home a few days ago and just could not turn around and go back .
So much or christmas this year we don`t even have the tree up this year i just have not had the energy to put it up and everyone else is just too darn lazy to do it .I just do not feel like celebrating very much at all .
The drs here has doubled the morphine for pain control and when i take it i feel so good i`m amazed at how much i can achieve in a couple of hours ( just the housework ) but then by the time lunch time arrives i`m back to being so sick again all i can do is lie down and sleep usually for about four hours .
Tonight i`m looking after two little boys they are here with me at present all but asleep they are no trouble whatso ever and infact have missed them so much .
I didn`t have any pai relief today knowing i was going to come up to their home tonight but i feel as though it`s going to be a very long night .