Overthetop, a merry Christmas to you!
Scientific results have shown that 70% of the patients respond positive to anti-depressants. This is around 70% for every anti-depressant, so trying out more will give you an even higher chance.
But you can also try to improve at least some things without medications or counselling. I think Christmas is the perfect time to think about blaming others (not the actual blaming, rather the mechanisms behind it). Blaming is a result from fear. It can be the fear of losing someone, the fear of someone judging you in a bad way, etc. Blaming is not accepting the situation. Christmas is about love and compassion, which are the opposites of blame and fear and anger. I mean, if you love someone, truly love someone, you want that person to be happy right? I think that is what true love is, wanting the very best for the other. If you want the very best for the other, you can't blame them, since that is negative. I am NOT saying you don't truly love your bf, oh no. But if you agree with what I say, you can try to become aware every time you blame him (or anyone else). You can then take a second to think of the consequences, think about loving him, and eventually stop the blaming. In turn, you will transfer love and warmth. You reap what you sow, and your bf, or anyone else, will give you love and warmth back.
Christmas is exactly that time, the time we give love to each other, to everyone, regardless what they have done. Why not make it Christmas all year long?
Take care, and have wonderful day!
Acceptance is the key
The World is but a reflection. Smile, and it will smile back.
Try to keep smiling! :)