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New Member

Date Joined Jan 2009
Total Posts : 11
   Posted 1/7/2009 9:02 PM (GMT -6)   
so im new to this site...
ive recently been going through a rough depression. my boyfriend of 8 months broke up with me a few months back, and i have been struggling since. some friends have turned on me, and one recently went into rehab. i know this sounds very petty reasons to be depressed, but i am just absolutely miserable. i try everything to get myself better and keep fighting.
on top of all this, ive been living with ocd and anxiety for seven years. i see a psychiatrist once a week and on-and-off with  and ocd behavior therapist. im on ambilify and effexor (recently switched off of seroquel onto ambilify).
no one knows what to do for me anymore. my parents have tried everything, my friends have given up on me. i really dont know what else to do at this point. please help.

Post Edited (horserider02) : 1/8/2009 1:59:23 PM (GMT-7)

getting by
Forum Moderator

Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42610
   Posted 1/7/2009 11:23 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi Horserider02,

I also take effexor and abilify. How long have you been on the abilify? Because it works really well for me. I have ocd type thinking patterns. And the abilify seems to free my mind. I hope that it works for you.

Welcome to the forum. I think that you will like it here. Keep on posting as we are here for you.

Best wishes,
hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

Elite Member

Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 1/8/2009 12:44 AM (GMT -6)   

Welcome to HealingWell. This is a great site. I look forward to getting to know you better. I am Kitt :-)

Anytime you break up with a friend you feel a loss and this is normal although to your right now I know it is very painful.

Please remember you are a wonderful person in your own right and try to stay in the moment. Let go of yesterday and tommorow is not yet here so live in the moment as that is all you have right now.

Keep on posting to us as you will make many new and wonderful friends here in HW.

Finish every day and be done with it.You have done what you could.

Gentle Hugs



Kitt, Co-Moderator: Anxiety/Panic & Depression
&  Moderator GERD  Forums

*~* *~*
Not a mental health professional of any kind
Peace does not dwell in outward things, but within the soul
Clickable Link: Anxiety-Panic Resources

Veteran Member

Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 585
   Posted 1/8/2009 5:12 AM (GMT -6)   
Heej Horserider!

Welcome to HW!

Kitt is right (as usual :-) ). Breaking up is almost never easy. And hé, your reasons to be depressed are just as valid as someone who lost his or her entire life in an instant, or someone who, well, hurt his toe. It is different for everybody, so please don't judge your situation.

For now, just take little steps at a time. Trying to run while you need to learn to walk will only make you fall. True friends don't give up on you, but you might have given up on them. Maybe you could call some, there reactions might surprise you!

And Horserider, there are so many wonderful members here, it might help a bit if you stick around and tell your mind. Some things you just don't want to say, but you can here. No one will judge you for it. I have some secrets myself as well, but a couple of members here know them. Though it ain't much, it did help me a lot.

Take care!
Acceptance is the key

The World is but a reflection. Smile, and it will smile back.

Try to keep smiling! :)

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jan 2006
Total Posts : 2408
   Posted 1/8/2009 5:53 AM (GMT -6)   
Hi there and Welcome to HealingWell,

You have already been given some great advice so I will keep it brief. I think problems are about perspective and if a problem seems big enough to cause depression for you then I dont think thats petty. We are all sensitive to different things and breaking up with partners and having friends going into rehab are certainly not petty as far as im concerned.

I dont know much about the meds that you are on at the moment but Karen takes the same as you so you might be best picking her brains on that front.

Remember: Yesterday is history, Tomorrow is a mystery and Today is a gift... that is why it is called the present

Everyone has a guardian angel. They help pick you up when you fall, comfort you through your times of need and help you appreciate the times when things are going well.
"A gold medal is a wonderful thing. But if your not enough without it, you will never be enough with it." - Irvine Blitzer (John Candy) in Cool Runnings
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Co-Moderator - Depression Forum
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New Member

Date Joined Jan 2009
Total Posts : 11
   Posted 1/8/2009 3:49 PM (GMT -6)   
thank you guys for your responses.
ive been on ambilify for a couple months on a pretty low dosage because it made me feel sick when i first started...
sometimes it is so hard to get out of bed in the morning. like i literally love my ex boyfriend...and even though im only 18 i feel as though hes the only for me and i will never be over him. and knowing we cant be together makes it very hard. plus, on top of it all, losing some friends who i had been friends with for years has been really difficult. i feel like im failing at everything and i dont really know how to keep getting through each day when i am absolutely miserable.

New Member

Date Joined Dec 2008
Total Posts : 13
   Posted 1/9/2009 11:08 PM (GMT -6)   
hey horserider, I'm ellen

I'm pretty sure that we're around the same age (i'm a senior in high school), and I've been through a lot of the stuff you're describing. if you ever want to talk, just let me know, it's easier (in my opinion) for people the same age to understand eachother haha

Your head'll collapse when there's nothing in it
And you'll ask yourself
"Where is my mind? "

Veteran Member

Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 585
   Posted 1/10/2009 5:15 AM (GMT -6)   
Heej Horserider!

I somewhat know what you are going through right now. As you I am 18, and had a similar situation a few years ago. But the truth is, others will be out there somewhere. There isn't a single perfect friend, because nobody is perfect, and everybody is perfect. What help me a lot was to realize that my love wasn't genuine, that it was just a rush of hormones and thoughts that made me feel that way. I came to the conclusion that true love is based on the happiness of the others. Obviously, that girl didn't love me, and if I where truly in love with her I would accept that and hoped that another guy or maybe girl would provide her with the joy she deserves. It might sound abstract, but it definitely helped me to overcome it, and to be more compassionate towards all living things (including myself!).

You seem to be your own worst enemy, as a lot of us are. Maybe you can try to treat yourself kindly, give compliments to yourself whenever you have done something good, even as small as going out of bed. Take time to do the things you want to do. You are a person as well, and you deserve just as much love and attention as others.

All the best!
Acceptance is the key

The World is but a reflection. Smile, and it will smile back.

Try to keep smiling! :)

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