newbie! advice!

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Regular Member

Date Joined Jan 2009
Total Posts : 51
   Posted 1/15/2009 8:57 PM (GMT -6)   
okay so lately ive been getting a lil better at dealing with my depression ive been having a real rough time, and im totally looking forward to things getting better,easier, i mean i still dont understand why people i loved dearly had to leave me way!! too soon my heart doesnt want to accept the fact that theyre not here anymore my mind does but my heart doesnt i cant take it sometimes i cant even breath at times thats how bad it hurts, i dont know what else to do i mean i try talking to people but the words dont seem to come out, and i feel worse, i mean i love them so much and miss them so much,, does anybody know any other way that i might heal,, <3 thanks!

Veteran Member

Date Joined Feb 2005
Total Posts : 616
   Posted 1/15/2009 9:34 PM (GMT -6)   
when you say people who you loved dearly leave you, what do you mean did they die or just break-up with you? I'm sorry about either way, if your talking about love and your special partner remember there is a lot of fish in the sea, don't loose hope. if it's a close relatives that has passed away I'm sorry to hear that, but remember if you love them they will always be with you..

Regular Member

Date Joined Jan 2009
Total Posts : 51
   Posted 1/15/2009 10:06 PM (GMT -6)   
people that i loved passed away, and im just emotionally drained my heart hurts and i cant seem to control how i feel, it hurts too much to accept the fact that someone you love isnt coming back no matter how bad you want them to,

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 1257
   Posted 1/15/2009 11:06 PM (GMT -6)   

Dear MX, I am so sorry you have lost people that you loved.  It can be very hard to come to terms with such a loss.  First of all, there is no time limit on grief.  You feel the way you do and no one should expect you to  get over it.  Our minds are logical but our hearts hurt in a much different way.  You said you have trouble talking to people about your feelings.  You can come here anytime and there will always be someone to talk to you and to understand. Have you thought of going online to find a grief support group?  If you find it hard to talk to people in person a grief support group might be able to help you more.  Also, do you live in an area that might have a support group where people have lost loved ones and friends?  Often hospitals or hospices have grief support groups and you don't have to have somemone who was in hospice.  These groups are open to all. I truly understand how you feel.  As time goes by you may be better able to come to terms with your grief.  Time is always the healer.  If you need to cry and it makes you feel better then let the tears come.  I know you are having a hard time but we are here to support you and give you the time to listen to you.  Please keep posting.  I will always answer you. Try to take good care of you.

Many gentle hugs,


getting by
Forum Moderator

Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42609
   Posted 1/15/2009 11:36 PM (GMT -6)   

Hi MX,

Aurora has some good advice for you.  I think that a support group would help you.  But that is entirely up to you.  And as she said, there is no time limit on grief.  We all grieve in our own unique way and there are no rights and wrongs where that is concerned. 

I hope that coming here is helping you.  I can tell you need some support and that you are really hurting.  Like Aurora said, if the tears want to come, let them out.  It is healthy to cry.  It releases so much and cleanses us.

Keep posting and let us know how you are doing.

Hugs, Karen

  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

Regular Member

Date Joined Jan 2009
Total Posts : 51
   Posted 1/16/2009 11:45 AM (GMT -6)   
thank you guys so very much for your advice, i truly appreciate the fact that you took the time to respond,
and i know that whenever i need to get some support
ill have people to support me, and Aurora i actually havent heard of any hospices in my area but i'll definetly look into it thank you so much!!! all of you!! <3 and ill def. keep you guys posted! <3
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