I didnt know what to do, I've been writing, but I need something that will provide feedback, so I came here.
Im more depressed right now than almost ever. Im so angry at the world and I dont know why. How logical is that, to be angry at the world, its not like the world stole my lunch money..Metaphorically speaking the world beat me up, shoved me in the mud, and ran me over with a bus. That seems exaggerated, but remember, this is MY head and feelings we are dealing with.
Im at school..my last class of the day. But in my last class, Im sure I had an anxiety attack. I had to leave because I was starting to cry...I cried some, foricibly holding the tears back. But, I couldnt help it. Everything just seems so dark to me. I have goals and dreams but I lack a vision of the future...
I tried talking to my teacher, no good. I told my best friend, he was all ears for me. He's totally there for me. He pretty religious, I am not...but he told me to pray and ask for help. Im so desperate, I prayed last night and I did exactly that. I asked for help, for guidance.
I think I have something good with my friend. As I mentioned, it's a guy. And...I kind of like him! ..(alot).. We are with each other alot, so thats my source of cheer!
Im just so angry at everything and I dont know why. Someone says the wrong thing, my dog not doing what I wish she would do...its all things that are my own fault and I just get angry for, really, no reason at all. I hate myself for it, but I cant control it..(maybe I just tell myself that I cant)...
Im really not sure what to do with myself.. After school I will most likely go see my friend and get a big hug. Because I really need a big hug right now... So..anyways, thanks for listening to me vent..
Lyrica and Paxil (both working quite well might I add!)
"Cracks in the concrete are just reminders that you fall apart
no matter how strong you are"
"Sometimes it is best to forget what you feel and remember what you deserve"
"Im going to
smile like nothing is wrong, talk like everything is perfect, act like its all a dream, and pretend its not hurting me."