My mom is coming down this Friday for my b-day, I can't wait to spend time with her, I miss her and I hate that we don't live close by. So on Sat me and my SO will be going out in the later afternoon to go bowling and to dinner, we haven't had time for ourselves in god knows how long. So she's doing it as a b-day gift but she says it's more of a gift to her to have time with her grandson. There is a week coming up in April, my SO's parents will be here and he will take a week of vacation, so we are going to tentativly plan to go away for a couple of days, depending on what we get back in taxes and such. It's not about
just having a break but it's everything that I'm feeling right now. Sometimes I wonder if I will ever be and do the things I want. It just seems so hard to get in a better space in life right now. I ordered my self help books a week ago and they are just now being shipped out so now I have to wait even longer for them. Sometimes I feel like I'm just relying on other things to get better instead of doing it myself. Like my books, I just get through until I have them then I have something to look forward to. I also don't feel like my counselor has been helping me, she is a nice lady but I don't really feel like she's giving me tools to understand why I feel the way I do about
certain things or how to go about
changing it. I feel like we just talk, which it feels good but I need better feedback. Anyway I'll stop for now.