Hi Karen: Thanks for responding to my meltdown. Yes, I had the money to pay for the insurance but kept putting off paying that bill to pay for the more immediate needs. That system obviously does not work for me and I am working really hard to change and fix things right now. In fact, I have an appointment with a woman from Catholic Charities on Monday morning to go over all my finances, budget, records, etc. to help me with the bank's remediation lawyer and straighten me out going forward.
I guess I just need to realize that it is going to take a lot to get this all fixed and may take awhile. Yesterday though I just really needed a breather before having to fix another one of my bad situations. But it ended up being okay. I found another insurance company and I'm actually better off with it so that is all fixed now.
Thanks for bearing with me and being so supportive. At the moment I am really trying hard to keep my house. I don't want it foreclosed. As to whether or not it will be realistic to keep this up afterwards in the long run I guess sitting with an objective person who is an expert on this on Monday will help me to see what I will really have to do.
I feel really guilty and a little selfish right now because I jeaopardized my finances by going back to school full time and then not feeling well with my depression. I just want to give my girls a better life than I had growing up and at the moment all they see is how stressed I am and not being successful at carrying through with "normal" things that I should be doing for them.